Narrator's pov
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Sometimes we care more than we should
Then it hurts us more when things don't go the way we expect it to
Sometimes we meet the right people but at the wrong time
But does that mean we let them go and hope to find them again?
We toss them out into the world and play a game with nature, hoping they return when it's convenient to us?
We could only hope that our feelings are mutual. That they feel the exact same thing as we do
But when we realize that they don't, it kills us inside
We crumble into sand, what was once a strong concrete block was now nothing but small particles being tossed again, only hoping to be put back together as a whole
So when Kate realized her feelings meant nothing, it only made her break into sand but this time she knew she had no one to put her back together
Because the person she wanted to put her back together was holding another woman in their arms
A pain that no one can describe
To see your crush smiling and twirling the small strands of hair around their ear when they talk to someone else. To see their smile the biggest it's ever been with that person and not you
But it wasn't just a crush with Kate
She knew she had gone further than she should have and she hated it. She hated every single second of the fact that she had fallen for someone who wasn't ready to be honest with her, to be there for her, to even acknowledge her own feelings
She hated the fact that she had fallen so deeply for Autumn Hester
Kate's hands gripped the metal lock on her trailer door, her forehead leaned against the wooden doorframe and her lips trembled as the hot breath left her trembling body
Her heart felt as if it was tied to an anchor and dropped to the bottom of the ocean, she felt every second go by when that cold layer came in. Layer by layer she felt colder, shaking from depths, filling every vein with water and slowly locking off any oxygen from entering her lungs. Then a burn came, a burn that trailed from the same cold water, relishing in each heart string until it reached every vein in the human body and setting it on fire. But with that pain soon came a poke. A poke of a sharp needle into the center of her heart, taking away anything positive she had written in her mind and allowing the dark feelings to flood into her system from that small prick
She had never had that pain. It was new, she had never had someone to care about as much as she did with Autumn. The girl was her first in many ways
Her first girl hookup, her first girl kiss, the first person she had ever genuinely had such overwhelming feelings towards and the first person to break her heart without even knowing it
"Kate" Her voice muffled through the door, only lighting a match in Kate's eyes
The brunette furrowed her brows as she slowly leaned up to the peek hole through the door
"Kate open the door" Autumn said
The shorter actress remained silent, not sure of whether to listen or to remain silent
"Kate please?" Her voice came again, tugging at Kate's heart that was already burning
"Baby" Autumn whispered so gently, the touch of rose petals were nothing compared to the velvet sound of her voice
