Untimely Love (Book 3)

♤Chapter 25♤

When we pulled up outside Jess' house, I was contemplating changing my mind.

I scratched my nails against my sweatpants hard enough that I felt them digging into my skin beneath. My legs bounced so vigorously that the car felt like it was shaking too. I brought my hand up to bite my nails but stopped halfway and planted it back on my thigh. This was a bad idea. Why was I here again?

They didn't need me. If they survived these past months without talking to me, they can go the rest of their lives. Everything was all too dramatic and overwhelming.

"I'll stay here until you're inside," my mom said, breaking me out of my internal semi-meltdown. I knew she saw how nervous I looked, but she wasn't giving me an out by asking me if I wanted to go through with it or not. That was all I needed really.

Nodding, I reached for the door's handle, slipping my phone into my coat pocket as I pushed the car door open. I glanced around at nothing, trying to figure out if I needed my bag. It would feel weird walking out basically naked at this point.

"I'll take your bag home."

I sighed but didn't look at her cause a part of me felt like I'd be glaring if I did. I knew she was trying to be helpful and encouraging, but could someone talk me out of this? Granted, Dr. Davis and I spoke more about it and she asked me a bunch of questions that led me to the firm conclusion of coming here. But all I needed was one person to officially say I shouldn't go and I wouldn't. My mom knew that.

All she did was smile at me though, so I forced myself out of the car.

Going up the walkway to Jess's house felt like a mile long in an endless desert. In reality, it was only a few yards in the freezing cold of Pennsylvania in winter. It was mid-December and even though we hadn't gotten our first snow yet, it felt like it wouldn't be long before we did.

I'm on the third of four steps when the front door flies open, startling me since my eyes had been on my feet. I only pause for a second but it was enough to have me almost slipping on the last step, making me latch on to the banister.

Jess stood in the door with a smile so wide, it was almost contagious. She was only in shorts and an oversized crop top—definitely not the type of thing to be answering the door in. Not in this weather.

"Okay," she exclaimed. "Come through, big chop!"

That got a short laugh out of me. Once I was close enough, she pulled me into a bear hug, rocking us from side to side and humming. It was like hugging my grandmother and in the best way.

A honk came from the end of the driveway once we let each other go. I turned halfway to wave at my mom, who I could tell was still smiling even from here. As she promised, she didn't pull off until we were both inside with the door closed behind us.

Jess helped me out of my coat and even that action was filled with excitement.

"I'm so glad you're here! Haven't seen you in forever." She hung my coat inside the open closet behind the door.

Her enthusiasm made a bitter feeling settle in my stomach because I wasn't exactly here to reconnect. At the same time, I had missed her—I think I missed her most of all actually. Plus, my mom had just left, what was the reason for letting her leave me here if I was only gonna stay for five minutes. In the end, it all depended on what she'd want after we had the conversation.

"You're just in time too," Jess continued. "I was making smoothies. You want one?"

My first instinct was to say no because I didn't want one. But I decided to ease into it rather than blatantly turn her down.