A BookSocial Series book
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"Because when shit goes sideways we put on our best shoes, caffeinate and keep going."
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Elora Hutchins has it all, except for a social life outside her family unit. In an attempt to find more of a balance, she agrees...
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As Logan waits to pull up to the curb in the departure lanes on Wednesday morning, I'm positive we look like we are heading to a funeral. Or perhaps like maybe we've just come from one. We barely speak as we sit stiffly in the car and stare straight ahead.
Logan's mom, Franny, stayed home with the kids so we could go to the Law Offices to sign the finalized paperwork for our divorce. It only made sense for him to drop me off at the airport after, but that didn't make it any less strange. The whole morning had been a surreal experience and a far cry from the one I'd experienced as a child between my own parents.
We decided not to tell Emily and Weston about the divorce until a few weeks after my trip, not wanting them to associate my leaving for a vacation as having anything to do with the end of our marriage. The kids have mostly adjusted to the co-parenting practices we've already established anyway. The admittance it will continue to adjust and never go back to once was, is probably harder on me than them at this point. Which just proves that despite wondering how I'd ever move on from Logan's betrayal, I really did think we'd make it through this.
The baby had changed everything.
Hurt and bitterness swirl in my chest as I lean down to unhook my tote handle from where it's caught on the heel of my cream Louboutin loafer. As I sit back up, a glint on my left hand catches my eye and I freeze.
I stare at the beautiful Princess cut two-carat halo ring set in rose gold. The ring is sandwiched between two other bands, my wedding band and the infinity band I was gifted after Emily was born as a "push present." A single angry tear runs down my face and I swipe it away before adjusting my cream colored silk camisole and black slacks, then shift my tote onto my lap.
When Logan finally pulls up to the curb and puts the car in park, we sit in a dazed silence. Neither of us moves. There will be no hugs, no I love yous and no I'll miss yous. This is uncharted territory. We haven't reached "friendship level" yet, if there will ever be such a thing. This is purely an arranged situation which we have mutually agreed upon.
Ironically, much like our marriage was, I guess, if you take all of the emotions out of it.
That thought suddenly has me questioning what I truly believe anymore when it comes to love and marriage. If it's all going to end in heartbreak, what's the point?
I turn to open the door and pause. Sitting back in my seat and looking down, I grab my left hand and pull off the set of rings. I slip the one from Emily's birth on my right hand and hold the others out over the console.
Logan open's his palm under mine and I carefully set the rings in his hand.
"El," he painfully whispers.
"I just... forgot to take them off before I left the house," I say quietly. "Will you put them in my jewelry box?"
I don't know if it's odd that I didn't just tell him to keep them, I can't question my decisions right now or I'll never stop. It would be an endless hole of questions in which I'd inevitably suffocate.
