The Player's Happy Ever After

Chapter 17 - Saying Goodbye

Lauren's POV

That night I went home and I cried myself to sleep. I woke up feeling broken, I had my very last exam for the year that morning. I knew my stuff, I just had to turn up and do the exam.

I got this.

That was what I kept telling myself. But the only thing playing over in my mind was the fact that I was supposed to be spending the day with Jackson. I promised him it'd be ok, I just wasn't expecting him to give up. It just never honestly occurred to me that he was going to die. He asked to see me and I didn't. I had the chance to make final memories but I turned him down. I chose work, studying, Ethan and a party over him! I really hated myself for it.

Before I arrived at the hospital apparently there had been an exchange between Randal, Jackson and the Priest who came to give last rights. Randal could feel Jackson slipping away, he had tears running down his cheeks then he was telling him to keep fighting and not to give up. The Preist then arrived, he grabbed Jacksons hand and asked him if he was scared to die. Jackson looked up into his eyes and said no I'm not scared, I'm ready to meet God. It was only a few minutes later that he past and a few minutes later when I arrived. I just wasn't there for him in the end and it was something I had to live with for the rest of my life.

I got ready for Uni and went into the kitchen. It was so quiet. I was about to leave when my Mum walked in. She was looking tired, her eyes were bulging, puffy and a little red.

"Lauren, where are you going?"

"I've got one exam left and it's on at 930am".

"Are you ok to do it today?" Mum asked.

"Yes, I just want to get this over with so we can help with the funeral". I shrugged.

"Ok Hun, best of luck," she hugged me tightly and kissed my forehead. "You're a brave girl!"

When I got to Uni I was quiet. I found an area away from everyone else. There were groups of people who were doing last minute cramming. Dennis came over to me and hugged me. I had let him, T and of course Ethan know about Jackson via text late last night.

"Lauren, what the fuck Babe?" He was really surprised that I was here today. He gave me the biggest hug.

"Dennis, I got this, just one more exam and I'm done. I know my shit, I just want this over".

We sat in silence for a few minutes, I had my head down. A few of our friends approached us I have no idea exactly who they were. I could hear voices. All of a sudden I broke down and started to cry. I couldn't stop, tears were flowing like crazy, I no longer had control.

"Why is she crying didn't she study?" I heard someone say.

"Her cousin past away yesterday". Dennis stated.

"Then why the fuck is she here?" Another voice questioned.

"This was her final exam she wanted to finish this". He was trying to explain my case.

"She needs to go to the counsellor now Dennis she's not in a fit state to do the exam today. Go to the admin building and speak to Larna at the help desk".

I was still crying, I have no idea who Dennis was talking to exactly. All I know is that I was holding Dennis's hand and he was walking me to the admin building. He was speaking to someone when I found myself inside an office. There was a lady looking at me she was asking questions. I just had no idea what was happening. Dennis had his arm around me trying to support my heavy grief.

"Lauren, Lauren, Lauren". She kept saying.

Dennis got me to look into his eyes. "Lauren, you need to talk to Dianne, she's a Counsellor and can help you today". I just nodded. Dennis looked over at Dianne and nodded as if to confirm we were ready to begin.