The Suffering Of Tate Langdon

Chapter 6: Weeks Turn Into Months

I can't believe it. We searched every inch of this fucking hell for him and, still, nothing. Where the hell is Tate?! Four months. And not even the smallest sign of him. My mind is periling into smaller fragments as each month passes, I miss him like crazy. My heart is broken and my mind Is aching. He really is that far gone, to continue to shoot himself, even when I'm in his presence. I'm sorry. His saddened voice remains to echo in my aching head. I love him so much, and he's broken because of me, and what he's doing to himself hasn't been helping him. I lay down on my bed, fiddling with my multiple layers of shirts, only to distract myself from everything else. My face is stained with dry tears, I've been weeping for the past few months, not thinking he'd be gone for this long.

I hear the door swing open from behind me, but I don't bother to take off my headphones. I close my eyes, trying to block out whoever it is trying to contact me. I turn up my music louder, blocking out everything with Smells Like Teen Spirit by Nirvana. But then again, it doesn't help, the person merely tears the headphones off of my head. It's my mother.
"What?" I snarl at her, trying to get her to eventually go away. "What do you want?"
"It's Halloween tomorrow, Violet." Her words send a long-awaited shiver through my body. Is it Halloween already? Can't be?
"Really?" I ask stupidly, I already know the answer to this question but I have to be sure.
I feel her hand work its way to my shoulder. "Yeah, really."

I want to get excited, I begin to, but then I realise that Tate is still missing and this will be the first Halloween without him. Where the fuck is he?! His absence is beginning to scare me. Like his soul has vanished from Murder House, and he's reincarnated as someone I'll never get to meet. I can feel myself start to tear up again, and my mother notices, embracing me in a hug in a single moment.
"Hey, we'll find him. That's why I'm here."
My face fires up at hers. Does she know where he is? But instead of the news, I'm waiting to hear, she instead asks me a question.
"Since everyone's going to be out all day and night tomorrow, would you have any idea of any places Tate would be? Anywhere special?" My mother's voice is reassuring and full of hope, she believes we can bring him back. Hell, she even managed to talk my dad into helping Tate be 'good' Tate again.

Her question sends my mind into a charade of thoughts, I beginning trying to imagine the places I went with him. I can't really think of any, but I'm not going to give up. I close my eyes to think harder. My mother is silent and patient, same as she's been since she died, I guess there's no time for impatience when you're dead. But that doesn't change my impatient nature. We never went to any parties together. No dinners. No dates. Wait. There is one place. I look at my mother.

"We went to one place together. He said it was his special place, he went there to think and get his mind off of shit," I pause, thinking about whether or not he'll be there if I try to find him. "But I doubt he'll be there the entire time, I'd have to check in. There have to be other places he'll want to be on his one night of freedom."
"Well," my Mom pauses. "I guess there's only one way to find out."
I nod. "What will you and Dad be doing tomorrow?"
"I and your father will be strolling Jeffrey around L.A. in the day. And then we'll be going out to dinner with Moira and Nora, as a thank you for being there for us and especially the baby. You can join us if you want, sweetheart?" Her proposal is tempting, but I'm going to focus on trying to find Tate.
"No thanks, dinner's haven't been a big thing for me. I just need to find Tate."

My mother nods at me and smiles, I smile back. She turns around and walks out the door, towards my baby brother's room. But as she exits the room, another woman enters, this time it's Nora. She looks at me with her lovable eyes and smiles, but I can tell she's concerned about Tate, and a little nervous for some reason.
"Hey, Nora," I smile, hiding the sadness I'm feeling right now.
"Violet, sweetie. You don't have to hide your sadness from me, I've been dead long enough to be able to know when someone's upset."
And just like that, she read me like an open book with a giant font, too easy. She walks towards my bed and sits beside me, putting her arm on his shoulder.
"I really need to talk to you."

Her voice is serious and concerning to me, this is about Tate. I already know that. Seems like I'm not the only open-book.
"Yeah, go ahead. What's going on?" I ask, playing with my hair.
"You already know this is about Tate, so I'll just get to the point."
"Yeah." I nod.
"I didn't think I'd ever say this, Violet. But Tate is gone, he's lost his mind in the most powerful but destructive path in the world. He's lost himself in love, but he's also lost himself in his hatred for himself for losing you. He loves you so much, and he had reasons for doing what he did, it's kinda' stupid, but I can promise you he had reasons. And the reason I'm going to say what I'm going to say is that I love Tate, he's like a son to me." Nora's voice is so compelling, like an expensive item for half price. She's dragging me with her words, and I want to hear the rest of them.
"Reasons? What were they?" I ask, curiosity bringing along the question.
"In all honesty, I didn't know he was doing it because of this, I had no idea until I saw the way he looked at me. All the things he's done; killing Patrick and Chad and," she sighs, breathing in heavily. "Raping your mother. He did to give me a baby, it was all my fault, I kept weeping and weeping, begging to see my baby again. And when I saved Tate's life when he was a child, he must've felt like he owed me."

I can't believe what I'm hearing. Nora's honesty is bringing tears to my eyes, she didn't spare one bit of honesty into the situation. It was all for her. Everything Tate did was to ensure Nora got a baby. He felt like he owed her and he did anything to repay her. So modest, and so ensuring for Nora. He killed Patrick and Chad because they were going to split up, and he did what he did to my mother because my parents were fighting and weren't going to have another baby. His actions were evil and monstrous, nothing changed that, but they were justified. I launch myself at Nora, embracing her in a tight hug, showing how much I appreciated her honesty.
"Thank you, Nora. I love you for your honesty," I say, tightening the hug.
"No problem, my child. But can you do one thing for me?" I don't think about her question, I just think about helping her, maybe that's how Tate felt.
"Yeah, what is it?" I ask.
"Find him, and save him. You're the only one that can."
I smile at her, clean my face with the tears that resulted from her proposal.

I watch as she exits the room and closes the door in the process, she must have read how tired I was, because I was going to do that. I lay down on my bed, placing my headphones back on to listen to Kurt Cobain's reminiscent voice. I stare at the ceiling until I finally feel myself drift off to my slumber.

I wake up to the sound of cheers and laughing; that's when I knew it was Halloween. All of the spirits were excited that this day has finally come, and so was I. I wasn't stuck in the house for one day, even though it was only one day, I planned on making a use of it. I was going to find Tate if it was the only thing I'd do today. I walk to my closet and open it. I slip on a pair of black and grey stripped tights up my thin legs, covering my underwear. I then slip on a cardigan, and then two extra shirts for my usual comfort. I then slick on a pair of new socks and my black leather boots. The last thing I grab is the black hat I used to wear to school. I wonder what Tate's wearing. I really hope it's something warm and comfortable, he's probably been out since it hit twelve in the morning. I look at the time before I leave my room; 7:15 am.

I work my way down the stairs but decide not to exit from the main door, it'd be a bit of a confusing scene for the neighbours, probably not Constance the stupid bitch. I see my mom holding my brother, so I head towards them.
"Happy Halloween, Mom," I say, hugging my mother then kissing my brother on the head. "Tell Dad I'll be back late tonight."
"No problem, Hun."
I walk down to the exit from the basement, but I notice something strange. There's a scrabble board out, and some of the letters have been formed into a note, and it's for me.

I'm so sorry Violet
For everything
I love you much
Beach

Tate

"No," I sigh to myself. "No fucking way!"
He's been down here. The entire time, alone. We searched here fifty times?! I have to find him, tell him it's going to be okay. I have to. If it's the last thing I do.
I slam open the door of the basement and exit the house, closing the door for safe measures. No kids are coming into the house tonight. I find my way to the street and stand on the walkway, trying to remember the walk to the beach when it hits me. I found my way back, It may take an hour, but I'm going to get there and find the love of my life.
"I'm coming, Tate."