Chance

Chapter 16 - Merry Christmas

Christmas Eve sneaked up on me. The days were long leading up to it but the nights went by in a flash. Ben came over almost every evening since Cami was never home and I didn't want to be alone. We never took it further than kissing and some light nudity here and there but I was becoming more impatient each time he kissed the soft spot below my ear or trailed feather light kisses down my stomach, stopping just below my navel piercing. His eyes met mine every time he did it and he smiled and moved away from me, leaving me flustered.

I was unsure whether or not I wanted to continue dating Ben only because I was scared of giving him the power to hurt me again. Cami had to keep reminding me that life was all about forgiveness and that I needed to forgive myself as well. I wasn't sure about what I had to forgive myself for though. It was funny to think that the same person that was supposed to keep me on the right path when I was trying to play Ben was the same one giving me life advice on how to make things work with him.

A couple of weeks made all the difference in situations like this. Maybe the app wasn't a scam after all. It brought me back to my first love, forcing me to forgive and move on and give him another chance. Something I never thought of happening. Whoever named the app and created the algorithm was a genius. I hoped that the other users were actually giving it an honest try. Although I was undecided on how to move forward, there was no denying that I let go of a weight I didn't know I was carrying. I gained a friend in Ben.

I watched as Cami carried her bags out of the front door after hugging me goodbye. She was spending Christmas with her family and made me promise not to open the gift she got me until she came back.

Ben was already informed of the time Cami was leaving so I knew it was only a matter of time before he showed up.

My eyes took in the scene before me. The blue and silver decorations that were hung throughout the house filled me with so much joy. Our tree was placed in the corner of the room decked with tinsel, decorative balls and other trinkets that matched the rest of our home. Cami was very pleased when we had finished it all.

I got an 'I'm outside' text a minute prior to a knock on the door. Ben began doing this since the night we went driving around so I didn't have to put on the deep voice every time he came to the door. I let him in and we walked over to the couch and he chose something to watch.

"How long is Cami staying at her parents' house?"

"Until the twenty-seventh."

Ben thought about that for a second, "Will you be okay being here alone?" The concern in his voice made my heart swell.

"I'm a big girl. I'll be fine."

"That doesn't mean I'll be fine knowing you're over here all alone," He whispered then planted a lingering kiss on my neck. His lips were so soft it was unbelievable.

I smiled at him when he leaned away, "You'll get over it."

Ben's hands slid under my top, pushing the fabric up. His movements made me more aware of the fact that I had chosen to go braless today. He moved the left side up the most and kept most of my chest covered while exposing my ribs.

His thumb brushed against my skin and I shivered, "When did you get this tattoo? I've been meaning to ask since I first saw it."

I glanced at it, the heart with my name in the middle of it was a gentle reminder to love myself, "It's to tell me that as long as I love myself, that's all I'll ever need."

What I didn't mention was that I got it because of him. Ben was smart. He easily put two and two together. He nodded and brushed his fingers over it again then let my shirt fall back into place.