My Date From Hell (The Blooming Goddess Trilogy, #2)

Theo's Giant Surprise (Part 1)

We found ourselves in a bright shop, hi-tech carpet drying fans and wet vacs neatly lining one wall. The green and brown sign above the counter read "Dry Ground Flood Restoration."

Why had Jack sent us here? A quick glance revealed that the others looked as mystified as me.

My first thought when the burly man with Popeye arms stepped out from behind a beaded curtain wearing a silver T-shirt emblazoned with a black Bishop's piece on it was he's the one going down, not Theo.

Relieved, I turned to my BFF, who had paled.

"You bastard, Hermes," Theo said.

The man roared, grabbed Theo, and tried to squeeze him in two.

I screamed and shot out a vine but was prevented from hitting the man by Festos, who knocked my arm away with his cane.

"You're supposed to want a second date, Fee," I hissed, rubbing my arm.

Theo had escaped the man's clutches but burly guy was going in again.

Kai, meanwhile, had lunged for Festos, who jumped away but Kai caught himself before making contact. Instead, he wrapped me in his arms. From the look on his face, he hadn't put me there consciously.

Still, it felt good to be enveloped by him like that.

"Could you please stop the man from killing my best friend?" I glanced at Theo, who had pulled out his chain. Yes, the chain forged by Festos, which had bound Theo to the rock. I'd seen the damage it could do. It wasn't pretty. He smacked the man with it. Flesh sizzled. "Or the other way around," I amended with a wince.

The man dropped Theo with a howl. "No fair, Papa."

Papa?!!

"Roughhousing is fine but what did I teach you?" Theo asked sternly.

The man hung his head. "Love isn't supposed to hurt."

Of all the head trippy things that had happened in the past several months, this took the cake. I couldn't keep quiet anymore.

I pushed out of Kai's arms. "What the freaking hell is going on?"

"Sophie," Theo said, his eyes carefully neutral, "meet my son, Deukalion. Buddy, this is my best friend Sophie. I think you know Kyrillos and Hephaestus."

Deukalion nodded at them then took my hand in his meaty one and shook. "Hárika ya tin gnorimia. It is nice to meet you."

Where to start with all the levels of how wrong that was? That he sounded like a five-year-old? That Theo was a dad?

I stood there, my mouth opening and closing but no sound coming out. Totally failing to compute.

"I don't believe it," Kai said. "We've finally rendered her speechless." He smiled slowly and evilly. "This is like the best present ever."

Deukalion peered at me, worriedly. "Sugar!" With surprising grace for such a meaty man, he jumped over to the counter, pulled out a small plastic container, and popped a handful of trail mix in my mouth. "Chew!"

Apparently I could still follow simple commands.

"That's my girl," Kai said fondly, once more taking my hand. "In shock and still able to eat."

"She doesn't look too good," Deukalion said. "You come home with me. We'll have tea." He looked expectantly at Theo, eyes shining.

"That would be ..." Theo took a deep breath, like he needed to compose himself. "Great, son."

"Geneia," Deukalion called out. "I'll be back. You watch the store."

A pretty, olive-skinned girl just slightly younger than me slipped out shyly from the back. "Yes, Papa," she said. She caught sight of Theo. "Pappous!" she cried.

Theo's expression softened and he gave her a hug, murmuring words of endearment to her.

"He's a grandfather, isn't he?" I asked Festos, unsteadily.

Then I fainted.

I came to lying on a hideously floral, lumpy sofa covered in plastic, my head on a pillow in Kai's lap. Did all the Greeks shop at the same furniture outlet store?

He looked down at me. "Better?"

"I think my brain has officially fried." Carefully, I swung myself up, ignoring the cracking noises of the plastic, and accepted a small, handleless, blue and gold glass stuffed with fresh mint and hot water.

I took a sip and made a face. "That's sweet." But really good. I knocked back a bit more. "So, Deukalion ..." I frowned, uncertain how to describe him.

"Deuk is a little touched from the drowning way back," Kai said. "But he's doing very well on his own and has Geneia to help look after him."

I cocked an eyebrow in disbelief at him.

Kai took my empty glass and set it on an end table. "Hey, it's the official party line. Who am I to deviate?"

"You're all kinds of deviant." I held up my hand to stave off any innuendos. "I still don't get it. Why are we here?"

"You heard the man." I glanced over at a grim-sounding Festos, who had just entered the room. "A bishop has to be sacrificed. Theo or Deukalion. One of them is going down."

"That's horrible!" I felt sick for Theo. "Does Deukalion even get what's going on?"

Festos sat beside Kai and me and rubbed his bad leg, his eyes tight with fatigue. "Sort of. Jack invited him to play a game. Deuk against Theo. A wrestling match, which, with his strength?" Festos shook his head. "There could be serious collateral damage."

"Unless Theo knocks his son out first. Which he could do if he uses his chain." Except, I knew Theo wouldn't do that.

"Not to further complicate matters," Kai piped up, "but if Theo doesn't do it, it's strike one against Hannah."

I pressed the palm of my hand into my forehead, hoping the pressure might spark an idea. Just a million variations on pointless. I hated Jack so, so much.