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A few days had passed and Cut still ain't come back, and I was starting to get worried. He ain't text or call or nothing and even though I was pretty much used to the way he moved, it was still an unsettling feeling in the back of my throat where I didn't know when he was coming or going. And, strangely enough, I was starting to get worried about Chyna since I ain't seen her since the dinner.

Within those days, I did do a little shopping. Okay, a lot of shopping actually. But even with all the money I decided to just be a lil thrifty with it. I decided to hit up this online lingerie boutique that everybody been buzzing about and I knew for a fact that my ass would look nice in her pieces. I think the name of the brand was Valentina Voight or some shit but I made sure to cop a few pieces before she went out of stock for the 5th time that day!

Even buying all of her shit twice for me and Jamie, it still didn't bust a dent into this money that Cut gave me. So, I just pocketed it. Put 500 to the side for hair, nails, and shit and stashed the rest. Cut ain't have to know how much everything was costing and who knows, I could easily stash this shit and have it be my own personal get out of jail money like Chyna once mentioned before. Either way, I was getting restless and I wanted to get out this penthouse no matter how nice it was to see the families and wealthy white people run the bridge. After the 3rd sunrise and nobody here to enjoy it with, it was starting to feel like I was locked away in a tower.

My body was still wrapped in a robe as I sprawled my body out on the plush, black suede couch. Turning on the TV, it was what I think was some kinda crime movie but it was playing a sad ass opera song that matched the tone of the scene perfectly. I watched and felt like a scene was playing in my own mind from the other night. Closing my eyes, my mind began to wander as the singer began to bellow on the show. Me and Cut fucked for hours it felt like while the coke laid out on the living room table in front of us.  His hands roamed over my body and I let him explore every crevice, every bit, every bump and every scar.

The living room was pungent with the smell of weed and wet pussy and I didn't dare show a hint of disgust. At what point or purpose? The shit Cut was doing wasn't nothing different than what my mama had did at an even mor extreme degree. So, I played my role. I fucked on him, sucked on him, and did what I felt I should do to secure my spot and have none other bitch circulate through his mind but Anaiis. Anaiis and Anaiis only running up and down his fucking mind and best believe I'll do what I gotta do so I don't end up in nobody projects ever again.

Eyes still closed, my arm swayed back and forth along the couch as the singer hit her high notes and I guess this was why rich people liked stupid shit like the opera. To hear a dainty hoe belt out her lungs like that brought out emotions in you that you didn't even know existed. I saw my daddy and flashbacks when I was a kid, holding on to his forearms as he picked me up high in the air. I saw my grandma smiling face, cooking pies and blueberry cornbread like she did every Sunday. I could feel the air get warm from her old-fashioned gas stove and I could hear my mama. Singing in the kitchen her favorite Aretha Franklin songs.

The opera singer notes got higher as the climax of the movie came to a head with my eyes closed. The female in the movie was stabbing some dude over and over again and blood was getting all over the walls. She didn't stop and the walls got redder and redder. Eventually, when the singer continued to say remember me, she stood to her feet, blood on her cheek and trickling off her hands. She undressed, took a shower with the man's body sprawled on the floor in agony as if nothing happened. With her hair in a bun, she wrapped herself in a towel, dug in the dude's pocket for her phone and screwed her face up as if she had just finished crying as the phone continued to ring.

911, what's your emergency?

Someone help! I think someone just killed my husband!

She unraveled her hair, shook it sloppily a few times and touched the man's body in random places before touching her thighs, her arms, and her face to make it seem like she was in a panic and trying to stop him from bleeding.

Calmly, she sat down alongside the bathroom cabinets and overlooked the window from the second floor until flashing police lights grew brighter and brighter.

My eyes shot open as the music stopped playing. I didn't even feel the tear that built in the corner of my eye until I tasted the salt in the corner of my lips. Why the fuck was I crying? I looked up at the tv to see the credits rolling and it kinda disappointed me, I was actually hoping to watch it.

I could hear my phone ringing in the other room so I rushed to grab it. It was my daddy. The knot in my chest built all over again till I couldn't breathe. I couldn't keep running from the only parent I virtually had left to show me something different. To make me believe something different.

I just-

"Hello? Ana? Baby, is that you?"

I held the phone up to my ear, my mouth slightly open anticipating a fly to rest any second now.

"Ana? Hello?"

"H-hey, daddy." Calling him that made my vision misty and all that anger I felt deep down disappeared and I felt myself choke. I felt like a little girl again but I knew that I couldn't fuck this up, no matter how much of a shit daddy he was. Something in me wanted to hear him out, if need be, one last time.

"Anaiis! Oh my god, baby girl. I been trine call you. Please, are you okay? Where are you? Who are you stay-"

"What do you want after all this time, daddy?"

"I- Ana...I know you mad. Mad as fuck and I'll eat that shit up till the day I die. But baby, let me explain- "

"Explain what? How you been missing for all these years and now you wanna get in contact with me after all these years? Explain what, exactly, daddy?"

"Anaiis, I been trying. I been trying for a long time to get through to you. Since Miss Ruthy died its been that much harder to get you. Shit, I only knew Kandi numb- "

"That's bullshit daddy. The same way you had her number you could have easily got her to give you my number. Its not like she was in her right mind anyway. So, tell me., how is life in Atlanta? With your new wife and 2 other kids?"

"...."

"yeah, you ain't think I was gonna find out or some shit? And you wanna talk about being a daddy to me now? Tell me why I should even believe you wanna build shit with me, your FIRST born?"

"Ana- Man, fuck it. You want to know? I'll tell you,"

My daddy was silent but I could hear him walking out of a room and closing the door behind him,

"After the last episode between me and your mama, where she fell down the stairs after our fight, Kandi was so mad that I wanted to leave that she had a case on me that kept me from you. Said I was molesting you and shit and that fuck nigga Junior was a "witness"."

The room felt like it was moving and I was the only one standing still. 

"What?!"

"Ana?"

I jumped so badly that I dropped my phone to the ground, causing it to reset itself and essentially dropping the call. When I turned round, I saw Chyna in an all-black bodycon dress and her natural hair silk-pressed in a ponytail. She had a large black adidas duffle strapped across her body and a look of shock on her face.

I didn't even realize I started crying again talking to my daddy.

This must be what tears of paradise felt like.

Remember me...

Remember me...

Remember me...

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