it was around 1pm one day and Y/n was shopping for baby clothes. She was very pregnant, and as voldy likes to tell her she looks like that day he swallowed her gynecologist. He was not wrong- she was very large.
Voldy was still getting his beauty sleep at home.
The sky was white like her lovers bare arse. This made her think abt what colour her baby's arse would be. She hadn't thought much about what it is going to look like, but she really hoped it looked like her boyf.
while reaching down to grab a poo brown baby wonzie she noticed that she had started to piss herself ‼
"oh goodness me!!" she ejaculated. her piss surprised her.
However when she looked down at the puddle on the floor she realised that it was not the usual toxic waste yellow colour puddled around her feet, nor was the putrid ammonia smell present.
instead it was crystal clear!
confused, she looked around for assistance.
"excuse me miss im pissing clear!! do you know what this means?" she asked one of the shop workers.
"babes I think your water just broke. wait you are preggo right? not just fat?"
"AAAA‼‼" y/n bellowed.
She couldn't believe it!! she was going to have her baby.
y/n waddled back home, leaking more fluid with every step
"Voldy!!" she called when she got in the house.
"yes hunny bunny"
"im having the baby!!"
"AAAA‼‼" voldy bellowed.
they decided to drive to the hospital, opposed to crawling. After a while they decided it was too reckless and juvenile of them to be getting everywhere on the voldymobile so they bought a car.
it was much slower, but it was for the best.
they listened to britney spears "im a slave 4 u" on the way there
upon arrival Y/n started having contractions and was rushed to a pregnancy ward.
A strange looking man entered the room and introduced himself.
"hello I am Dr Snape"
he had greasy black hair and a big nose. he was the opposite of her hubby but y/n thought he was hot.
"hello Dr Snape" said Voldemort. He also thought this doctor was very hot, and didnt mind him being the midwife.
After a bit of time Y/n hopped into the stirrups and started to push.
Voldy held her hand tightly and spoke words of encouragement to her. he was so gentle and sweet, knowing that she was giving birth to his child.
On the first push Y/n squeezed the slimy spud straight out of her. as it emerged from the depth of her uterus, Y/n squeezed voldy's hand tightly.
the foetus torpedoed out of her at 60 kmph and was caught by Doctor Snape. it was very slimy, and as he brought it closer to the new parents it almost slipped out of his hands.
Voldemort put his hand on his mouth and squealed!! he was so excited to hold it.
"its a girl!!"
