In Denial | Alex Turner

XLII

Six Months Later...

Alex's POV:

"Hey... Hey, can you... uh.... Can you hear me?" a guy kept nudging my shoulder. "Mate, we're worried," he continued.

I mumbled something I didn't even understand and groaned, pulling my face off my 'pillow'. I looked down at where my face had just left a dark black spot, and squinted my eyes, trying to realise where I was.

"Thank God, he's alive," I looked up and found a woman touching her chest and breathing heavily.

"The hell?" I muttered as the man helped me stand up. I looked down and saw I was laying on the bloody pavement.

"You were passed out in the middle of the road, mate, we were worried," the man explained as I straightened my quiff and fixed the collar of my leather jacket.

"It's okay, I'm fine, cheers," I mumbled as I started walking away.

"Are you sure you're okay? We could call someone to—"

"I said I'm fine!" I snapped back. "Fuck's sake," I shook my head and started walking down the street furiously. 

The empty roads were visible as doubles in my eyes, everything was blurry, and everything was going the other way. There was not a single street lamp for me to lean on, or a bench to lay on. Just pitch black.

"Fuckin' hell," I mumbled, rubbing my forehead and trying to make everything less blurry before my phone started ringing.

I started patting myself all around my pockets, trying to find where the annoying ringing sound was coming from. Eventually, I found it in the inside pockets of my leather jacket.

"Al? Alex, where the fuck have you been?" I heard a very annoyed — but at the same time panicked — Matt on the other side.

"I'm fine, Helders, I'm fine," I groaned. "Can I ask yer summat, by the way?" I blinked a few times, adjusting to the light and then rubbed my eyes.

"No, Alex, come back to the-"

"Where does Monica live?" I asked defeated and heard a scoff from the other side.

"Alex, you're pissed and, most possibly, high again. Come back to the hotel," he sighed desperately and I groaned.

"Just give me a bloody address, Helders," I begged.

"Come back, or I'm tracking your phone down and picking you up myself, Al," he warned and abruptly hung up the phone, leaving my impatient arse having that strong desire for her again.

Monica's POV:

The annoying buzzing on my nightstand next to my bed woke me up while I was having a great sleep. I sat up on my bed and groaned. I fluttered my eyelids open quickly and rubbed my eyes with the back of my hands. The annoying buzzing kept going, so I just decided to pick the phone up without checking the caller ID.

"Who's this?" I spat annoyed and laid back on the bed.

"You no longer have me saved, Bella?" the other voice spoke, and I widened my eyes.

"Alex?" I asked. "Why are you calling me again? I told you, I'd block your number," I sighed and covered my face with my hands.

"Bella, I fuckin' miss you," he whined. "I've missed your scent, your hair, your face, your voice... Hell, that voice, I'm so glad you picked up the phone."

"Alex, it's three in the fucking morning and you're pissed, again," I groaned and turned on my lamp, getting out of my bed.

"I want to see you, Bella, please," he slurred and I clenched my jaw, trying to steady my breath.

"No," I replied bluntly. "Bye, Alex, don't call again," I spoke harshly.

"No, no, no, please," he begged. "Please, don't end the call," he cried. "That's the first time I hear your voice in two months."

"You only call when you need a shag, Alexander," I sighed.

"I'm not lookin' for a shag!" he replied defensively. "I just miss you, Bella, please," his voice cracked at the end of the sentence and a couple of sniffles followed. I remained silent and walked up to my window, pushing the curtain out of the way and looking outside.

"I'm outside, wandering around town, and everythin' fuckin' reminds me of you," he confessed and came into sight. I widened my eyes at his imbalance and bit the inside of my cheek so I wouldn't cry too.

"I'm now outside a fuckin' building. A creation out of bricks, and that reminds me of you," he continued crying quietly. "You'll never realise how much I've regretted that day," he continued. "All I think about is you, all I talk about is you."

"I had to break it off with me bird because I can't get yer out of my mind, Bella," he sniffled again and sat down on the pavement outside my house, leaning on a street lamp.

"You should move on, Alexander," I stated, and before he could speak, I spoke again. "We both should. We didn't work out, and that's fine," I gulped. 

"But we didn't try makin' it work!" his voice was now pretty raised.

"Alex, please go back home," I begged. 

"I don't have a home anymore," he replied and I furrowed my eyebrows.

"Selled the apartment," he replied. "It had a lot of you in it, I couldn't bear it," he continued, and I sat down on the window, watching as he was now resting his head on the street light.

"Alex, please..." I sighed and bit my bottom lip in attempt to hold back the tears.

"Let me just explain myself, Bella," he begged further. "One more chance is all I'm askin' for," he sighed.

"I've come a long way trying to get you out of my mind, Alex," I sighed. "I can't tear the whole wall down now," I formed a line with my lips.

"Remember when we used to be all laughs and smiles?" he completely ignored my confession. "When I'd come by the bar and talk with you and wait for your shifts to finish," he chuckled. "Or when we'd mess with the paparazzi..."

"Alex..." I sighed once more, getting tired of the whole situtation but also not wanting to end the call.

"I know I fucked up, I fucked up big time, Bella," he paused, "and I'm truly sorry for that," his voice started softening. "But if you gave me one more chance, maybe we could fix what we shattered," he continued.

"It's best to leave everything shattered the way it is, Alex," I quietly spoke, biting back my tears. "Leave it shattered and walk away, move on," I added. "I'm sure our paths will cross again, that's how it always works."

"So, please, go back to the place you're staying. The others are probably worried," I added before I heard a final sniffle from the other side.

"Good night, Arabella," he mumbled defeated and stood up from the pavement.

"Good night, Alexander," I mumbled back, relieved my talk had worked. 

And with that, he ended the call, putting the phone back into his back pocket and rubbing his face with his palms. He took a deep breath and looked around before he started walking towards the pitch black streets.