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IT WASN'T your fault.
Cornelius's words race through my mind on an endless current as I leave his study.
Dorren and Nenat.
The mark is a warning.
They went across the sea.
Dorren and Nenat.
They had to leave.
It wasn't your fault.
Across the sea.
I need the noise to stop. I need to find somewhere where the world is silent and doesn't scream at me from every possible direction. I need to find Edmund.
I call down the line, tugging at the invisible cord suspended between the planes of the world. It's stretched thin and feels fainter than usual: an indication of how far apart we are. The soft vibration that travels back in response is weak, but it's enough to give me a direction. I follow it outside, leaving the citadel and crossing the bridge to the village — to the boy on the other end.
I can feel his worry and panic before I see him, leaving the tight confines of the outer village to find him returning from the prison camp. And I know he must feel whatever storm of emotions I'm drowning beneath because his eyes are burdened with pain and he rushes forward to pull me into a hug.
I feel like a pathetic, helpless shell, clinging once again to Edmund Pevensie while the world throws itself at me like a battering ram.
"I'm sorry," I mumble, loosening my embrace to let him step away. "I'm fine."
Edmund tightens his arms around me fiercely, refusing to let me go. "You're not fine," he says, flooding the connection with affection and soothing reassurance that makes me hold tighter to this incredible boy that I have no reason to deserve. He has no way of knowing what I'm so upset about, but he doesn't need to. All that matters to him is that I'm not okay and that he be there when I need him.
"It's okay," Edmund tells me. "You don't have to be alright all the time."
"I feel like I'm never alright anymore."
His lips brush against my neck in a gentle kiss. "I know," he murmurs against my skin. "It's going to feel like that for a while."
Sighing, I close my eyes and rest my head against his shoulder. "I'm tired of it."
Edmund falls silent and I know what he's going to say before he says it.
"I could carry you, if you'd like."
Despite myself, I smile. "That offer still stands?"
