Finding You

Chapter 15

Thanksgiving Break 2019

"Grams!" Embracing Grams as I step up onto the front porch of our house, wisps of vanilla and lavender follow her, her telling scent. Whistling air quietly sounds behind us as it brushes through the blanket of leaves on the front yard, picking them up and twirling them until it releases them back down to the ground.

"Oh sweet pea, I have missed you."

"I have missed you, too."

—

Grams and I cooked dinner, and then followed up with a round of cards and a glass of wine. Afterward, we made our way out to the back porch, relaxing in the cool fall air that chilled my skin.

"Old Grams is getting tired. I'm heading up to bed, are you coming in?"

"I think I will stay out for a bit longer," I say with slight hesitation. "Goodnight Grams, I love you."

With a smile that could light up the darkest room, she says, "I love you too."

After Grams goes inside, my head relaxes against the top of the chair, gazing up at the speckled sky. Rich blues and navy intertwine together, stars swimming and floating in a dark sea, wondering about as free as ever. I wanted to be them.

The tranquility of the sky passes through me, calming every nerve. Physically I'm alone, but I don't feel alone. It's odd. An unfamiliar feeling of bliss creeps up my body, a stranger who wants desperately to be let in.

Fear strikes, trying to break into a place it's unwelcome. Fear that this was only a glimpse of happiness, and that I won't ever get it again. I shove it back down. Down to where it cannot be found, where it won't bother me again.

At least I hope not.

—

"Does anyone know how to cook a damn turkey?" I ask. Henry, Kaia, and Delia drove down this morning to help cook a Thanksgiving dinner for Grams. I had invited Sebastian too, but he had said he couldn't get out of a 'family holiday issue'. I've noticed he tenses up when I ask about his family, so I don't push on the subject. I sent Grams out for the day with a friend of hers for some pre-thanksgiving shopping, just about any store starts their sales the day before now.

"Put it in the oven and hope for the best."

"Henry, I cannot just hope for the best. This is for Grams, remember."

"I'll call my mom and ask," Delia says. "Henry, do not touch that turkey."

"Look, Luna asked and I was just giving an honest solution."

"Yes, an honest solution to ruining dinner and scarring Grams," Kaia says. Sarcastic annoyance shows on Henry's face as his mouth opens in insult with a small gasp.

With the help of Delia's mom on the phone, we managed to cook a turkey that when we took it out of the oven to be cut and plated, the savory aroma of it followed and filled the house. Creaking of the old door from the garage sounded, Grams was home. She entered the kitchen, eyes wondering with curiosity of what we were doing.

"Surprise!" Delia shouted with her arms stretched out.

"Oh my stars," Grams said, her mouth wide open. "You cooked this feast? All of you?"

"All went well once we figured how to cook a turkey," Henry says with a cheeky smile towards Grams as he leans down to her for a hug. "Wouldn't do it for anyone else."

The first ten minutes of dinner was sounded only by forks scraping up mashed potatoes and macaroni and cheese off plates, everyone stuffing their faces with gravy covered turkey and green beans. Grams talked about her day and all the great steals she found while shopping, while we talked about school and the upcoming holidays. For Christmas Grams and I typically invite a handful of her friends over for an extravagant party. Well, as extravagant as it can get here. That just means everyone dresses up in their finest clothing with dazzling red and green jewelry. I was always the only one there my age, which was fine with me, I loved Grams friends. And if course the holiday party always have bottles upon bottles of wine.

We finished up the night with plenty of laughter. Whether it was Henry teasing Grams, although it was mostly the other way around, or us girls making tipsy, clumsy remarks that for whatever reason made us laugh til our stomachs hurt.

It amazes me at how much I love these people. It is moments like this you never want to end, full of laughter and bliss, so we have to hold to them for times when we need to feel this way again.