~Bad Dreams~

Tears, Makeup, and Puffy Eyes

I couldn't believe what I did, and I don't understand how I got home. I don't remember driving, or talking to anyone, honestly I don't remember falling asleep last night, however I do remember bawling when Brady asked me where I had been. That's the only thing I remember, and then it is all a daze, so I got up and checked my phone to find it blown up with messages, from that stupid unknown number, why was he even using that anyways? I looked at them all to find at least 10 that asked where I was, 5 that said he is so sorry, and the other 5 were threatening that he would come to my house, he's on his way, he's at my door come answer it, random guy staying at my house said to go home, and lastly he said he's glad I am okay, but he is coming over later. I flopped onto my bed, and let out a sigh, my eyes were burning, and puffy around the edges. I plugged in my headphones and listened to my favorite play list on Sound Cloud, my eye lids were heavy when Brady came in and mentioned "Morning sleeping beauty, time to get up hun, we are going to see mom and dad today." I jumped off my bed and got dressed as fast as I possibly could, a coral tank top, jeans and some sandals, while I brushed my hair I thought about maybe calling Andrew, but I remembered what happened last night and figured it would be best for him to call me first. I put on minimal makeup so no one can see the permanent dark circles under my green eyes. I looked so pale, and dull like life itself was hard, which it was. I put down the useless makeup, and accepted my horrible look, and pulled my hair back into a high bun. Brady yelled for me, and I rushed down the stairs while getting my hair to cooperate, it finally did and I left the house feeling excited, nervous, and scared all at the same time. When we got in Brady's truck and were heading down the road, I worked up the guts to ask him something. "Brady, are we going to see Mom first, or Dad?" He shrugged, "It's your choice, who do you want to see?" I was surprised by this, I didn't expect him to tell me to choose at the last minute. "Um, well, let's go see, Mom first. Since she will probably be the hardest one to see." He nodded, and turned a sharp turn down a dirt path that I didn't even consider a road. "This is the way?" Nodding, I continued with my questions, "This doesn't even really qualify as a road." He rolled his eyes, "This is the way Cienna." I shot him a glare and my phone vibrated in my back pocket, I yanked it out quickly and saw it was from an unknown number, but not the one Andrew had been texting me from. I screen-shot it and sent it to the most popular person I know, my best girl friend, Andy and asked if she knew this number. Ten minutes later, she responded that it was...Alex Sanders, and my stomach inside flipped inside out and around until I felt like I might puke. The text asked how I was and if everything was okay, so I sent him a quick text back that everything was fine, me and Andrew talked and I am okay, or at least better now, I am going to see my parents today, and also a quick thanks for all the help yesterday. I turned off my phone, and then I was at the Medical Home my mom was staying at, while getting out of the car some butterflies threatened to make me throw up, but I kept my best composure, took a deep breath and walked into the home. The smell burned my nose, it smelled so sanitary and clean, almost like lemons and chlorine, and the white floors, and walls made me want to close my eyes, the fluorescent lighting gave me a head ache, I could practically taste their cleaner. This place is going to take a while to get used to, I thought in my throbbing head, my brother checked us in and the lady at the desk took us to our mothers room. I couldn't mentally prepare myself for what I saw when I walked in, a lady who looked scared beyond her mind, with eyes wide and a room messy, clothes were strewn across the room and onto her bed, the bed wasn't made and the women that was supposedly my mom, had a messy head of hair, and wrinkles on her face. She had deep purple almost bruise like dark circles, and scratches all over her body and face. My eyes started to water, but I quickly brushed the tears away and sat down across from her, her eyes looked wild, almost rabid, but when I smiled at her, they softened the tiniest bit. "Hi, Mom." She gave me a be-wildered look and was obviously confused "I know this is all confusing, but I am Cienne, your daughter and this is Brady, your son." She shook her head quietly on her sot bed, and scratchy quilt. She spoke this time, softly but legibly "I don't have any kids, I was never even married, and I don't remember any of you. What are you even talking about?" She asked frantically, her mind was racing I could tell and she was getting more and more nervous. I tried to calm her down by holding her delicate hands that I knew so well, "I know, I know it's okay that you don't remember because I am going to tell you our story." She looked at me skeptically as if she didn't trust me, quite frankly I didn't trust me. So, I let go of her hand and waited for her patiently, her heart rate went down, and her pupils went back to their normal size. Her hands stopped shaking and she relaxes, "I would love to hear this, story of yours." I nod and tell her that I want to make it extra special, so I will come back tomorrow with a book to read to her of our story.