Look but Don't Choke

Chapter 14

            

          The next day I decided to follow Larry around and see if I could pick up on any unusual behavior, but to my bemusement this man was the very definition of ordinary. He went to work, then lunch, then back to work. The only thing bizarre about the whole mundane adventure was the interlude after lunch (some sort of allegedly healthy restaurant where they sell eggless, wheat-less, fat free monstrosities) where he stopped by some sort of holistic health and alternative medicine store.

            Was he sick?...Or just crazy, I could accept either at this point.

            I managed to follow him inside, and watch him use his lunch hour to browse aisles full of unpronounceable supplements, black seed oil, and colloidal silver…whatever the hell that was. I would have never mistaken Larry for a Yuna, but you can’t always tell these things about people.

            He dicked around for a bit before settling on some sort of detox concoction then took his purchase to the front register. “Excuse me,” he said with perhaps the meekest voice that ever inhabited the Earth. “This stuff will help with my allergies, right?”

            “Oh, yes,” the cashier said. “My boyfriend uses this all the time and his bowels are much more regular than they used to be. He even looks better too, but you didn’t hear that from me!”

            Larry nodded. “Alright, I’ll take it then.”

            Why all this worry about health when a couple months ago he was freely visiting a likely disease-ridden strip club where I’m certain I caught scurvy just by inhaling the oxygen? What kind of oxymoronic shit is that? And man that cashier over-shares like a motherfucker.

            Whatever his thought process, he paid for his goods then left, with me tailing as far behind as I could. I thought about following him for the rest of the day but the guy seemed harmless, and frankly boring.

            I walked back to my car, defeated. What a waste of a day! I learned nothing new, got nothing done, and Pasha was probably pissed because I’d left her with all the work this morning (again).

            I opened the door but just as I was about to get in I heard footsteps bounding up behind me. I turned in time to see Larry stepping way too far into my personal space, his expression no longer wide-eyed and ordinary but enraged. I backed up before he could slam into me.

            “Why are you following me? You’re with them, aren’t you?”

            “I don’t know what you’re talking about, man. I came for some colloidal silver.”

            “You and this yellow car have been following me since Ramona Drive. Who are you? Were you sent by him? It wasn’t enough to kill that sweet girl, now he wants to kill me too!”

            “What the hell are you talking about?” I looked around. There were clusters of people about, some of them peeking over to watch the commotion.

            “That Delgatto person. Admit it, you work for him. He keeps sending his thugs to follow me around. I won’t be intimidated you here me!” He got louder and stepped further into my space.

            “Look sir, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” It seemed to provoke him.

            “You tell that mad man to stay away from me or I’ll call the cops and blow their whole operation!” He had backed me up so far I was pressed against my car.