Daisy in a Meadow

40 - Love

The silence between us was heavy, pregnant with anticipation. This was the moment I had been dreading and yet yearning for—a chance to unburden myself of the secret that had haunted me for years.

"I've never told anyone this before," my voice was quieter than I'd intended it to be, and Elias appeared to be holding his breath to hear every syllable. "But, my father... he was physically abusive. To both me and my mother."

Elias tightened his grip on my hand without even realizing it.

"Growing up, we lived in constant fear, walking on eggshells, never knowing when his anger would erupt," I continued.

I closed my eyes as I recalled the vivid memories etched into my mind. The fear I had felt as a child haunted me to this day. With his coarse thumb, Elias gently traced the thin scar which ran from my upper thigh all the way down to my knee. His touch elicited a trail of fire on my skin.

"Was this...?"

"Yes," I answered his unspoken question, "he gave me that scar. When I was thirteen, my mom had left for a work trip. I had to take care of all the cooking for the week—because of course, a grown man can't possibly cook for himself. I remember it like it was yesterday. I'd decided to make potatoes and chicken, only, I'd accidentally fallen asleep while the potatoes were in the oven. They burned, and of course, my father was pissed, so he took the knife I'd used to slice the potatoes, and he..."

"What the fuck?" Elias' words were blunt and laced in fury. "What kind of sick monster would do that to a child—no less, for burning food."

I nodded in agreement. Despite the solemnity of the situation, I felt a twinge of amusement. With how angry Elias looked, I was certain that if I hadn't done it myself, he would've killed my father for what he'd done to me.

"It happened during the winter break of freshman year," I continued, looking down at the grass. "My mom, I think she'd had enough of everything. On Christmas Eve, when my father wasn't home, she'd found his secret stash of alcohol and she... she poured it all down the sink. She thought she'd be making things better. If he stopped drinking, maybe he'd stop hurting us. Only, he was completely livid when he found out."

I found myself wincing at the memory. Elias' dark eyes looked deep into mine, silently granting me the strength to continue.

"I'll never forget that moment," I whispered, "the moment when I ran downstairs and saw that-that monster beating my mother right in front of the Christmas tree. I knew if I didn't step in, he was going to kill her. It was like something inside me snapped. Without even thinking, I picked up the nearest object—a heavy glass vase—and swung it at his head. He fell, and he didn't get back up..."

I could practically see the gears turning in Elias' head as he was finally able to connect the last few puzzle pieces to the story.

"The police ruled it as self defense. Since I was a minor they tried to keep it under wraps, but still, neighbors talked, classmates gossiped. Pretty much everyone in the grade thought I was some psychopath who'd murdered my father for the heck of it," I shook my head. "What hurt the most was my mother's reaction. She couldn't bear to look at me after that day. It's why she disappears for days, even weeks at a time. She despises me for taking away the man she once loved, even if he was a monster."

With apprehension, I peered up at Elias, preparing myself for the judgement and disgust that I was sure to be met with. To my pure and utter surprise, he wrapped his arms around me, drawing me into a warm embrace.

"Daisy, I can't even begin to imagine what you've been through. You were just a kid who was protecting your mom, defending yourself." Elias spoke with conviction, his voice filled with reassurance. "It doesn't matter what anyone else says. It's not your fault."