meet me at midnight

chapter 2

Everybody was talking. And I can't seem to find the opportunity to butt in since I'm afraid they'd just stare at me if I ever say anything. Maybe that's why I grew up as a listener and not a talker. I'm afraid nobody would listen to any of my random thoughts.

"Hey, did you know that Jihan from our class earlier looked for you? What's up between you, huh?" Sohee suddenly teased me even did that eyebrow wriggling thingy, and I can only roll my eyes at his revelation. Jihan has been bothering me for quite some time now after we parted ways in a bad light. After realizing that I don't have a chance with Anton and that my puppy love towards him will only bring me dispair, I ended up trying to date other guys.

And Jihan was that other guy.

We were getting along so well at first, not until he showed his true colors. He was only dating me since he wanted to get close with Dohee. I should've known from the start, with the way he was staring at her, to the way he wouldn't even let me tell my friends or any other people that we were dating since he said he wasn't ready to be out yet.

I tried understanding his reasons, and because I was quite naive at first, I just let him do his way. But, I do wish I knew more. Although I was also unfair since I wasn't totally in love with him, I still feel hurt whenever he's brought up. It's like my karma. We used each other, but still, the pain I felt was still something I don't want to feel ever again.

That's why I'm fine with not dating anybody. It's better to be single for now.

"You know I don't like him anymore, right? He should go and fuck himself," I annoyingly blurted out, not wanting this topic to be brought up again.

"Yeah. That's right. Jihan can go suck his own dick!" Sungchan cheered, making the others laugh, but I remained emotionless. They don't know that I don't want him to be a topic of any of our conversations, and I can't even bring myself to tell them that, since they enjoy making fun of him.

And I do enjoy it whenever they'd make fun of him, but I can still remember how low I felt when Jihan revealed his true intentions. How he'd never date me in the first place if it weren't meant for him getting close with Dohee.

It just made me realize that at the end of the day, I was and still am a second choice for anybody.

"Hey, guys. I think we really should stop talking about Jihan now. Yuyu here seems uncomfy." Anton suddenly brought up, and after saying all that, he looked at me next, and whispered, "You okay, yuyu?" I could only nod as a response.

I wanted to cry. Anton's voice was too soft and comforting, especially with how he was calling my nickname. I also love how he stood up for me, knowing that I wasn't the type to talk about what's in my mind most of the time. And him doing that, only made me fall deeper. Again.

I knew I should stop this silly unrequited love that's been going on for 7 years now, but it isn't easy. Especially if you're crushing on someone like Anton Lee.

"Is that true, Yumi? We're sorry," Jiwoo and Dohee were the first ones to apologize, and the others did too. Now I wanted to melt. I hated this much attention from them. But, I was still thankful to Anton for speaking up for me.

We all parted ways since we all had classes after lunch time. But, of course, they didn't miss to tell each other that we'll be meeting at the nearby mall to eat before we all go home. Everybody agreed, and since I'll be riding with Sungchan, I knew I also need to come with them.

Classes at 1 pm are boring. And I'm always sleepy whenever it's this time of the day, but because of the limited slot offers for this major class, I needed to take this since it's the only one available. I'm currently a first year Creative Writing student.