meet me at midnight

chapter 18

While looking at the clothes twist and pull at each other inside the washing machine, I can't help but think that it's kinda masking the monologue inside my head as I try to find the right words to say incase Anton asks me later on why I suddenly acted so immature earlier during the car ride.

I was then distracted by the faint sound of the microwave from the kitchen, a sign that my meal for tonight has been heated. My parents went out to go grocery shopping, while Sungchan was still at his meeting. Alone and hungry, that's what I am right now.

Well, I'm not really alone, since Kissy is with me. But she'd rather be alone than be in my company anyway. That cat doesn't care about the person who feeds her, aka me.

It's been an hour now, but I still can't forget my annoying attitude earlier. I ignored Anton earlier when I went out of his car, not really ignored, but I didn't act the way I usually act around him just because I was being jealous. I'm already a 20 year old girl, and yet, here I am acting like a high school student.

And I hate it. I hate how fucking immature and childish I am right now. I hate that I'm trying to be nice, despite wanting to tell Bora to back the fuck off. Because I know I can't just act the way I want, especially if it's something that will affect Anton.

Yet, I can feel my heart aching a bit at the thought of Anton and Bora together with their families eating together, and maybe even laughing at something Bora would joke about. She'd get to see him smile prettily, and I wouldn't. She'd get to spend more time with him after school, while I sit here alone.

And what hurts more is the fact that they both look good together, it also seems like they belong in the same hierarchy with how wealthy they are base from Bora's stories a while ago in the car. Our family's not poor, but I can't really compare to how rich they both are.

Why can't I ever be the girl that suits Lee Anton? Is it really not meant to be?

I just wish Anton would magically appear in front of me. Maybe he'll know the answers.

Goddamnit, Jung Yumi. Stop being so selfish.

While eating, I was shocked to suddenly hear a honk outside the gate, and I assumed it was only Sungchan coming home from his meeting at uni, so I decided to go out and see why he honked instead of just opening the gate himself.

"Get in, loser. I'm treating you to dinner." Sungchan rolled his car's window just to say those words to me. I wanted to rejoice since it is free food, but I'm not in the mood to deal with him right now. I already feel too shitty enough.

"No." I answered shortly, before walking back to our house.

"Yumi! Spend some time with your brother who missed you!" he whined, but I decided to just ignore him. Why are brothers so annoying?

Sungchan followed after, before he went out of his car to run after me and wrap his arms around my shoulder.

"You okay? You never turn down free food," he asked, concerned. And I wanted to tell him what happened, but then again, I can't let him know that I like his friend. That would be a disaster and kinda weird. I just don't want my brother to know that I'm flirting with his friend, okay?

"Yeah, I'm already eating though so no need to buy me food." I told him, trying my best to sound as normal as possible. And I guess it worked since he was already going to the kitchen to prepare himself some food as well. While, I on the other hand finished mine and went to the sink to wash the plate I used.

"I thought Anton would be here. You guys seem to be closer than before," Sungchan suddenly commented, and I almost let go of the glass I was holding because of feeling shocked from his question.