Beastly Desires

Chapter Fifty-Eight

Gregorie groaned and rolled off of Colette. It was past midnight and they were in their bed having had sex a third time that day. Colette looked over at Gregorie who was panting. A thin layer of sweat coated his forehead and nose.

"Is this because you'll miss me while you're away?" He panted through breathes.

Colette smiled up at the roof of the bed panel. She would miss him, but she feared her feelings towards him would waver beneath the dark shadow that she would find herself in front of tomorrow. She wanted to mold and form their bodies into one solid flesh. One solid fortress before she departed. She felt it necessary to hold strong against the feelings she felt for Sébastien.

"I will miss you. I will miss your mouth the most. Your strong hands. The feel of your body against mine."

Gregorie grinned fiendishly and rolled over onto his side and propped his head on his elbow. "Are you trying to seduce me again? I've nothing left to fill you with. I am dry as a bone. I would be surprised if anything came out at this point."

His humor softened her tense body and she rolled over onto her side and smiled halfheartedly.

His eyes darkened and concern showed on his face. "What's wrong Colette?" He reached to push a strand of hair from her face.

She debated whether or not to tell him the truth. That this kind old lord was a young beast of a man with rage issues. A man who slaughtered his family. Who took what wasn't his. Killed out of desire. Mared not one person but two persons now. Beatrice's face appeared in her mind. She felt nothing towards the woman but pity.

"Is it your father? Are you worried for him traveling this long of a distance again?"

Colette shook her head and heaved out a sigh. "I'm worried... for myself."

Gregorie examined her face, her naked body atop the blanket before leaning over to kiss her nose. "Let me take your burdens." He whispered across her cheek, kissing her there as well.

Colette couldn't help herself and tears began to pool around her eyes. It pained her to see how much he loved her. She wished she could replicate the same feeling. She did love him but she felt it wasn't enough still. A piece of her heart belonged to the beast and it tore at her very soul. She couldn't understand why she clung to the darkness, why it scared her to let go. She thought she had when they said their goodbyes but nothing was settled between them. What was left was a gaping hole filled with an ache so big, the sex she had with Gregorie would never shadow it.

She shuddered and the tears spilled down her cheeks. Gregorie moved to bring her into his arms. She cuddled up next to him, getting as close as she could. She wished she could climb into his skin and share his blood.

"I'm sorry." She whimpered. "I'm so sorry."

Gregorie smoothed a hand down her back over and over again. "Shhh... it's alright my love. Shhh... it's alright."

Colette let herself fall apart in his arms. She cried until she had no tears left and her eyes felt swollen. Gregorie held her the entire time, promising peace and joy. Promising a future that Colette knew balanced on an edge of a cliff with her tittering along it.