Beastly Desires

Final Chapter

"There, there."

The dusty brown mare neighed as Gregorie brushed her golden mane. He loved this horse. She was gentle and forthcoming. She didn't fight back or take him astray. She was perfect in that sense. He would continue to take good care of her. Provide for her what she needed, but most of he would protect her if he felt she was in danger. It's hard to loose something you care deeply for and not have control over the situation.

He thought of his father and his mother. They knew the early signs she had years ago would only worsen. His father knew the woman he had loved for many years would see him as a stranger once day. A person she vaguely remembered but couldn't understand why. He would reach out for her in hope she would recognize him but her mind would betray her and she would run. It happened once. When he was eight and ten years old. Her mind fell into the shadow beyond memory and she did not recognize her own husband who frantically grasped at her in desperation. She screamed, kicked, clawed at him to get away from her. Everyone stood by and watched it happen. No one intervened. It wasn't until he told her her deepest desire did she come to. It was like a viell had been lifted and she stared at her husband with guilty eyes and tender love.

Gregorie knew in his heart that Colette loved him. Even if she did not love him as much as he did. He was so nervous when she agreed to kiss him in exchange for his mare. He didn't think she would follow through but he knew how much she loved her father and her acceptance was genuine even if it was out of desperation.

He kissed her and she didn't flinch. She didn't swat him away like she normally did. She was serious and a little hesitant at first but he felt her open up to him and he lost himself for a minute, taking her suddenly against the wall of the stable. He regretted how poorly he acted after she left but his stomach was not in knots because of that. She left him with a promise that she would come back to him.

He never thought the day would come when she gave into him and accepted his proposal. But it did come and even though she said yes, he still felt unsure of her answer. There was something different about her when he found her coming towards the stable.
She looked different. Something in her had changed or had been awaken. He wasn't sure what though but that whatever it was she mentioned in her letter they would suffer through it together, till death do they part. He would accept whatever burden she harbored, whatever desires she wanted, needed. As long as she was happy, he would accept them. As long as she loved him.

Now here he was. Waiting for her. Like always. Leaving her behind at that castle was the hardest thing he had ever done in his life but he did it because he loved her. Even if she loved another. He would give her that opportunity. The opportunity to come to peace with what she most desired. Even if it meant he would lose her.

Something in his gut told him to go to her after she and her father left towards the kind lord who took them in. He shook his head in disbelief. The lord he saw was young, ruggedly handsome and stern. He wondered what else Colette had not told him. That thought left a bitter taste in his mouth, but he was grateful. Grateful that she even gave him the time of day let alone her hand in marriage. Her body. Her most precious possession. He would keep those beautiful memories in his heart forever. He would learn to let her go and love another with as much passion and willingness if it came to that.

He watched the sun dip behind the trees and led the mare into her stable. "There, there. I've got you fresh water and hay. Anything for my girl."

The horse nodded its head and Gregorie stood at the threshold of the stable, looking out towards the setting sun. The blue that seeped in above it reminded him of Colette's eyes and he started to cry.

Was he a fool for letting her go?

He dropped to his knees as he felt his heart start to break. Beautiful, Colettte. Come back to me, please. He whimpered into his hands and started to pray. He prayed for her safety. For her happiness. That every desire she had would be met. He prayed she would come back and say goodbye, just so he could kiss her one last time. Hold her hands in his own. Pain wrenched at his gut and he hugged himself, closing his eyes and rocking back and forth on his heels. Was this what a broken heart felt like? Crippling pain.

He raised his head, blinking through watery tears and nearly fell to his to his face. Colette was walking towards him. She had her arms wrapped around her waist and she wore a deep green cloak that billowed out around her skirt. Her face was ashen as she neared him.

"Gregorie." She looked down at him and her eyes were filled with so much emotion tears beagn to spill down her cheeks.

He couldn't move fast enough and bolted upright wrapping his arms around her. He crushed her soft body against his and he heard her whimper against his chest.

"Colette. My beautiful Colette." He couldn't stop the tears that fell. The ragged breathing. He was touching her. She was real. It wasn't a dream.

He kissed the crown of her head and she pulled back to look at him. Her face was flushed and there was a joy in her eyes he had never seen before. His heart sank because he knew he was not the one who had elicited it. She was here because his prayer had been answered. She was here to say goodbye.

"Gregorie, I-"

"No." He brought his finger to her lips. "Please. Let me have you in this moment."

Colette nodded and he leaned down to kiss her. He trembled against her mouth. She still tasted the same. He opened his mouth to hers and she opened hers in return. They kissed one another deeply and he felt his soul wrap around the both of them. How he wished he could seep into her body and become one with her.

Colette gripped his arms tightly and he pressed her closer to him. He wanted her to feel his need between them both lest she forget how much he desired her. How much he loved her, before she left him alone.

"Gregorie," she breathed, pulling back.

No. No. He wasn't ready. He clamped his mouth shut, scared to even breath as she looked up at him with feverent eyes.

"I came back for you." She whispered.

His whole world turned upside down at what she said. He felt his heart heal ten times over and the very breath in his body expell out in one great sigh. He lost all feeling in his legs and dropped to his knees. He clutched her skirt and looked up at her with teary eyes.

"You... you came back for me?" His voice was hoarse. He did not deserve her pity if that was what she was offering him. He would not let her live a life unfulfilled because of her guilt.

Colette smiled and it was genuine. He felt the warmth of it fall on his face and he closed his eyes.

"Why? Why did you come back for me?"

He felt her hand on his cheek and he shuddered at the touch.

"I came back for you because I love you, Gregorie. You are my husband and I am your wife. I will always choose you. You have given me a happiness none other can give and it has taken a long time for me to understand that. To come to peace with that. I... I would never be happy with... with him in that castle. Not the way I desire to be. Gregorie, you are my happiness."

He did not realize the tears that fell until Colette brushed them away and he found her fingers with his own. He brought her down to kneel in front of him and he embraced her, kissing her passionately.

She was his and he was hers. Forever and ever.