The Day Hope was Murdered

6. If at first you fail, please don't try again

Note: this chapter was rewritten on 3/13/16. The beginning will seem familiar if you've read it before, but please read it all the way through, because there are some MAJOR changes and things you'll need to know.

// Chapter 6: If at first you fail, please don't try again \\

The Blurriness is back. I can't see anything, except a never ending darkness. Then I feel a sharp burst of pain. From my leg or my head, I can't distinguish. Then complete and utter blackness once again.

It continues on like this for I don't even know how long. I randomly wake up and see nothing, hear nothing, just feel pain and then I'm gone once more.

Then there's one time when in addition to the pain, there is a distant sound that seems millions of miles away. It is as the sound of a fly's wings beating back and forth... Barely there. But as I lay there in the dark, the noise increases, as if it's traveling closer towards me.

I can distinguish the pitch of the sounds, a male and female voice, talking back and forth, yet I can't quite make out what the voices are saying or who they are. And when I try to open my eyes, it's as if they're glued shut. I can't open them. I can't move. And then, the blackness consumes me yet again.

--

"-need to get a job. I've been having to work double shifts because all you do is sit around. I won't accept this anymore. It's been three months. Get over it. She's not coming back."

"This isn't something that I can just forget! Maybe if you weren't gone all the time-"

"I'm gone all the time at work! Slaving my butt off to make sure we have enough money. It's not like we have an unlimited supply of it! I actually, have to earn it!"

"You know, money isn't everything. Maybe if you took a step back, you'd understand."

Conversations like this have been ever present. My hearing has been restored, the pain, I know it's from my leg now, is gradually decreasing, yet somehow I still can't move.

The whispered yelling continues.

"I can't step back. They threatened to take the h- you know what? Nevermind. Just... You need to just get a job." It gets quieter. "I can't do this all on my own. We made promises to understand, help each other forever. I'm going insane from worrying about everything. You, money, Leila. Just please, get a job."

"Okay, fine. I'll get a job."

"How about you start by applying to that little cafe downtown? I heard the tips from there are pretty good."

"No. I decide where I want to work. You're making me get this job, and I'm doing that for you, so at least give me the freedom to choose what it is."

"Okay. Whatever. But please just try and get one soon. This is too much for me. My shift starts soon. I have to go."

And then, a door closes. Although I still can't see it, it makes a monstrous sound in my ears, and afterwards there's a ringing that lasts until I once again, slip into a state of unconsciousness.

--

At one point, I wake up. In all essence, I've been awake almost this whole time, but could never move, just hear and feel the pain.

But now, I am finally free. I can move.

My eyelids are stuck together so it takes a brief second before they separate. Then a bright light blinds my vision.

Someone's voice invades my hearing. "She's awake!"

After what seems like decades, I can make out the faint outlines of shapes. A human body, standing directly in front of me. It's moving around and blurry, like fog.