Never Coming Home // Frerard

Chapter 24

Three days. Three fucking days. He said he wouldn't leave me, but he lied, because he hadn't talked to me in three days.

All I was able to do was hide in my room and act sick so that I could avoid going to school. So that I could avoid seeing Frank, who was probably hiding from me so he could hide from the fact that he was falling in love with me.

Mikey was getting worried, I could tell, but I didn't care. He tried to talk to me, but I'd dismissed his words and just told him that it was a normal depressive episode, and that I'd get through it in a couple of days. He didn't believe me, of course, but I'd take what I could get in order to get out of going to school.

What I did at home while I skipped school was pretty uneventful: I drew, pictures of Frank, mostly, I ate, and I slept.

But god, there was only one thing that I wanted to do, but everybody I knew would hate me if I did it.

But it was just so tempting. I almost didn't care what they thought, but Mikey was the one holding me back from doing it.

He'd been the one who helped me get sober, who dealt with me the whole time, who helped me even after I relapsed. I couldn't relapse again, because even though he'd probably help me get sober again, I wouldn't be able to handle the disappointment in his face.

But that didn't keep me from thinking about it, from thinking about the burn that the harsh alcohol would leave as it ran down my throat, and the overall hazy feeling that would build up with each sip.

"Gerard."

Speak of the devil: Mikey stood in my doorway, his arms crossed, his eyes narrowed to create his "I'm not gonna deal with your bullshit today" expression.

"Hey, Mikes," I replied, not even trying to mask the sadness, the defeat, the pain that coated my voice.

"Spill," He said as he plopped down next to me on my bed. "Why haven't you been going to school? Why haven't you been talking to Frank? Why haven't you been talking to anybody, for that matter?"

"It's..." I almost wanted to say that it was nothing, but I knew he wouldn't believe me for a split second. "Something happened with Frank. And I can't talk to him. I don't want to see him... And that's why I've been skipping school."

"What happened?" Mikey instantly dropped his 'tough brother' act.

"I told him... Something."

"And what is this 'something'?"

I took a deep breath. "That I'm... Asexual..."

"Okay," Mikey acted as if it was the most normal thing ever, "And what did he say?"

"Nothing. Absolutely nothing. It was the most horrible silence I've ever endured. And then he just stood up... and walked away. He fucking walked away without saying a word to me, and he hasn't talked to me since. He hasn't called, he hasn't texted me, he hasn't said anything to me since I told him."

Without a word, Mikey stood up and grabbed my arm, pulling me with him.

"W-where are we going?" I asked as he pulled me up the stairs.

"You'll see," Mikey replied simply.

He practically dragged me to the car and shoved me in the passengers seat, and I was able to narrow the destination down to two possibilities: Starbucks or Frank's. I prayed to every religion I could think of, and maybe even a few superheroes, that it wasn't the latter.

But, of course, it was.

And 15 minutes later, Mikey was pulling the car into Frank's driveway.

"Mikey, I'm not going it ther-"

"You will go into that house if I have to stab you with a rusty spoon and drag you inside by the end of that spoon."

~

"Okay. You two are together. Kiss. Talk. Hold hands. Fu- oh wait..." I almost laughed at Mikey's fuck up. "Just fucking resolve this, because you have both been whiny emo messes and I'm sick of it."

And with that, Mikey walked out of Frank's room, closing the door behind him, leaving Frank and I standing awkwardly, making occasional eye contact.

"I'm sorry..." I was the first one to speak up.

"For what?" Frank's curiosity was obviously sparked.

"For being... Me."

Frank gave me a look of pity that made me want to cry. "Gee, you have absolutely nothing to apologize for. Fuck, if one of us is going to apologize, it should be me. I fucked up. I shouldn't have walked away like that."

"Why did you?"

"I don't know," he admitted. "I honestly fucking don't."

"Why didn't you talk to me?"

"I was positive that I colossally fucked things up, and I didn't think you'd want to talk to me."

"I thought I was the one that fucked things up, and I thought you didn't want to talk to me. I was pretty sure that all of my worst fears had come true."

"Well, I guess we were both mistaken, then," Frank laughed.

"Yeah, I guess so..." I sat in silence for a second, trying to form my next sentence. "So, since that's cleared up-"

"I have no problems with your sexuality," Frank answered my unfinished question. "Actually, I think it's pretty interesting. I just... I needed time to mentally adjust, I guess. I mean, I'm not like Brendon and Ryan, who like to fuck like rabbits, but I'm also pretty sure I'm not ace. I needed to process it, but there hasn't been a doubt in my mind about you, Gee. I care about you just as much, and probably more than I did yesterday, and the day before that. Don't ever think that I'd leave you, okay?"

I nodded, and for the first time, I wasn't scared of losing him.

~~~~~~~~~

I am such trash for my own story I stg

~XoSpark