Knight in Shining Suit (formerly) Knight in Shining Armani (PUBLISHED)

1. MOTIF

1.

MOTIF: a dominant idea color, or central theme.    In choosing a color motif for a wedding, keep in mind the colors that mean something in your relationship, and what you want to attract in your future.

 “We’d like the colors moss green and brown.”  Estelle, the happy bride-to-be was saying to me and my best friend Nicole.  I watched her dreamy eyes and her happy smile and I couldn’t help thinking if I looked as ridiculous as that when I was planning my own wedding.

Nicole smiled back at her enthusiastically.  “That’s a good combination.  So…”  

“Jungle-like.”  I suggested, cutting Nicole mid-sentence.                               

Estelle stared at me for a moment and her dreamy smile threatened to fade from her beautiful face.  “Excuse me?”

Nicole glared at me with a hidden message that said: Please, just shut the hell up if you can’t say something nice! 

“What she meant was… earthy.”  Nicole said smiling back at Estelle and from the somewhat constipated look on her face, I can tell that she was trying her best to pass on some of her enthusiasm back into the bride-to-be. 

“No.  I meant jungle-like.  If I meant earthy, that’s what I would have said.”  I said bluntly, which gained me another glare from Nicole.  This time her hidden message was: You’re so dead!  I raised a brow at her and flashed her a crooked smile that was meant to say: I already know that!

“Excuse me?  Do you… have a problem with me?”  Estelle asked reluctantly. 

I sighed.  “No.  I’m sorry, sweetie.  I don’t have a problem with you.  I have a problem with green.  Moss green to be exact.  And since you’re in Malibu and are planning for a beach wedding, maybe you should take a look at gold, yellow or orange and red, with maybe a bit of indigo?”

I thought Estelle would tell me to get lost right then and there.  It didn’t really matter.  I don’t care anymore.  Weddings used to be my thing.  However, because of the recent events in my crappy life, it now gives me pain to see happy, blushing bride-to-bes.  It is easier for me to imagine that maybe on the night of their fiancé’s bachelor party, he might actually be humping the stripper inside the big cake!

“I’m… sorry, Estelle.  I know you like green…”  Nicole started apologizing on my behalf.  She didn’t even bother to glare at me anymore.  She knew that I couldn’t care less and we’d only look unprofessional if we spent half the time glaring at each other.

“My fiancé likes green.  I… in fact, like… orange.” 

“Unfortunately, I don’t see green and orange going together with your theme.  I hope you are paying for the wedding.”  I said under my breath.

“Actually, I am.”  Estelle said raising her chin proudly.

I smiled at her.  “Good for you!  Then you should plan it the way you want it. That way you get to keep your wedding ideas in case your fiancé decides to marry someone else at the last minute!”

“Might I have a word in private, Astrid?”  Nicole asked me with a grave look on her face, that she was not even disguising in front of Estelle anymore.

“Sure.”  I said, smiling sarcastically.  Then I turned to Estelle.  “Please do consider choosing between orange and green.  If I were you, I’d make it worth my money.  Think of things that are green…”  I said, trailing thoughtfully.  “Hmmm… like vomit.”