TDA Meets TLH

38: Cordelia

The night after Christopher came for us, I could not sleep. The entire day, Emma and Cristina had been running around, trying to plan the party we were having tomorrow night. Lucie, Anna, and I had helped them as much as we could, though we could not quite keep up with them. I turned onto my back, and sighed. It was midnight, and everyone else was sleeping, but for some reason I could not.

I huffed and got out of my bed. I put on my robe, and slipped out of my room. I padded down the hallways quietly,and into the kitchen. I poured myself a glass of water, and slowly sipped it. As I drank, I heard a noise coming from the balcony, that was attached to the living. I set down my glass, and walked to the balcony. There, standing, was James. I straightened up, and walked up next to him.

"What are you doing up?" He asked, curiously.

"I cannot sleep." I replied.

"Neither can I." James said.

I looked out onto the beach, sighing. The waves were crashing onto the shore, and I smiled slightly. All my life, I had wanted to go to a beach, and now I finally had. The only places I had ever been were London, Paris, and Idris, but almost every Shadowhunter had been to Idris. I always wanted to travel, though I knew I could never leave Lucie. We were Parabatai, bound to be where the other was. Not that I minded, though.

"I have always wanted to travel to America." I found myself saying. "But I know I could never leave Lucie for that long." Or you.

"I understand." James started. "I always want to travel, as well, but I cannot imagine leaving Matthew."

"It will be strange when we're all off and married, not being with our Parabatai's everyday." I smiled slightly.

"Something tells me Matthew will not marry. He enjoys being single, too much." James chuckled.

"And you?" I asked. "What do you want?"

He shrugged. "I don't know. I would like to have children, one day, so I would like to be married. What about you?"

"So do I. My mother is always trying to get me to court her friend's sons, but I never do." I chuckled softly.

"I understand. You should be free to love who you choose." James said. "My father always used to tell Lucie and I that."

"Well, your father would know much about that." I smiled, knowing the story of him and aunt Tessa.

James smiled. "I guess he would."

I smiled again, and looked up at the sky. The night was clear, and the stars were bright. I savored the image. I never saw the night sky so clear, in London. There was always so much fog and pollution from the factories, that it always blocked out the sky. But here, they were so bright and clear.

"It is beautiful here." I sighed dreamily.

"Quite." James looked up at the stars. "That is something you'll never see in London."

"The future is amazing, it makes me wish we lived here." I replied.

"I don't know." James said. "I like how home is much simpler. Here, everything is so complex, with their computers and internet. At least, I think that's what they called it."

I laughed. "I know what you mean, though I do love the clothing here."

"I do, too." He smiled, and then it disappeared. "But now we're leaving."

"Hush, I do not want to talk about that." I spoke sadly.

James chuckled, but agreed. I smiled, and looked at him. He was already looking at me, and I was lost in his golden eyes. They were so bright, that they seemed to light up the balcony. Suddenly, I was leaning and so was he. Then, his lips were on mine, and we were kissing. I felt electricity run through my veins, and I could not believe that he was kissing me. After a few more seconds we pulled away, and we only stared at each other, shocked.

"By the angel." I whispered.

"I love you." James then suddenly blurted out.

I froze, my eyes widening. He loved me? No, I had not heard that right.

"What?"I asked.

"I am in love with you." James flushed.

I had heard him right. I felt my heart stop, and I was numb for a few seconds. James Herondale, the boy I had been in love with since I had been ten, loved me. I had dreamed of this scenario almost everyday for seven years, and now it was happening. I could have imagined the feeling a trillion times, but it would feel like nothing compared to the actual thing.

"You--You're in love with me?" I whispered, still shocked.

"Yes, and I know you do not feel the same, but I just had to say it." He looked away from me.

"You think I do not feel the same way?" I asked.

"Why would you?" James asked. "What is there to love?"

My heart broke at his words. Oh James, I thought, if only you could see yourself through my eyes.

"Everything." I whispered. "There is everything to love, and I love it. I love you, James, and I have for seven years."

His beautiful golden eyes widened,and he looked as I had a few seconds prior.

"You cannot mean that." James said finally, eyes wide.

"I do, with all my heart. I love you." I spoke again.

In a second, I was in James' arms, and he was kissing me. My arms went around his neck, and I kissed him back, happily. We kissed for a bit longer and then we pulled. We then spent the rest of the night talking and laughing, and I was the happiest I had been in a long time.