Counting Stars and Scars {Kellic}

17. Have Heart, My Dear

{Song- Run by Snow Patrol}

-Tony's POV- (surprise!)

To say the least, watching Vic go through his own hell has not helped fighting through my own one bit, just because it's so similar.

It's not unusual for me though, unfortunately. I still feel bad, because I want to help Vic as much as I can, but the truth is that I can't throw all my being into it or I'll end up worse then before.

But, thank god I have Jaime.

He's helped more then he could ever know, and I know I will be eternally grateful for that. Although, now might be a good time to mention that I may or may not have a tiny crush on him. What can I say? Jaime has always been there for me, thick and thin of it all. Sure, sometimes he's a giant, yet loveable, idiot, but it doesn't make me like him any less.

Watching Kellin and Vic get together over these past few months often makes me sad, just because it reminds me that I'll probably never have Jaime to myself, and that's for a multitude of reasons.

First of all, Jaime isn't gay. Not even a little. He loves talking about girls, it's one of his favorite things to do. I mean, I like both boys and girls myself but Jaime isn't anywhere near that.

Which poses our next problem. I also happen to be asexual, and I also don't see Jaime having a relationship without sex anytime in the near future.

See the issue?

I sigh as I struggle with combination on my locker. Damn hunk of metal. It's already been a long day at school, and I just want to go home and nap. Or maybe watch Star Wars. Or maybe both. Just as I'm trying to stuff book in my locker and thinking of the lovely possibilities for my evening, Jaimie walks up to me. Speak of the devil. Or angel? Not sure.

I try to ignore the little flip my stomach does when I see his dark hair (I've always loved the way it stands straight up in the air) and his warm brown eyes.

"Hi," Jaime says in that constantly excited tone of his. "What are you doing later?"

I'm slightly distracted, because a couple totally random things just fell out of my messy locker as I try to shove another book in, but I answer with, "Uh. I'm not sure. I was thinking about a Star Wars marathon or something."

"It's always Star Wars," Jaime teases me.

I stare him down. I don't like it when people make fun of my Star Wars addiction. "Fight me."

Jaime puts his hands up in surrender. "Okay, okay. Star Wars is the best." He looks down at the floor where a couple of my things still lay. "Why do you have a lighter and a Darth Vader figurine in there?"

I sigh in frustration and lean down to pick them up, along with some paperclips and pencils that fell out as well. "Because the lighter could be useful and the figurine...well... I don't actually know why it's there. But don't judge."

"I'm not judging."

"Good." I put the stuff back in my locker, but just as I do, another book falls out. I roll my eyes, totally done with today.

This time, Jaime leans down and picks it up, looking at the cover. "Erm. And you have your Bible in there?"

I take the book from his hands and tuck it under my arm, making a split second decision to take it home today. "Yup. Problem?"

He shakes his head. "It's still weird though, no offense. Like you're bi yet you're still religious?"

Well, bi and asexual. But I haven't told him the last bit yet; I feel like that would be something he wouldn't be able to understand. Still, I give him a tired look. We've been over this many times, yet he still finds it weird. "I've told you, it's not really a religion, not in my book. And if you really understood it, there's nothing wrong with being bi as well."