Monster ~ Jackson Whittemore [Book 1]

Guilty Conscious

There was a nice breeze drifting through Beacon Hills. The wind catching the ends of Maya's hair as she sat in her car, waiting in the parking lot of the animal clinic. Her cheeks were stained from tears she was trying to hold back, but her resolution didn't last long when she saw Scott hurry out of the building.

The werewolf had barely made it into the car before her arms were thrown around him, holding him tightly. Scott could feel his shirt becoming damp with tears as Maya's sobs were muffled into his chest. The werewolf awkwardly patted her back, not quite sure what was happening right now.

Maya pulled away, her eyes tinged pink from her crying. "I'm so sorry Scotty, I shouldn't have left you. You could have died if Deaton hadn't found you. I should have been there-" The words died in her throat, coming out as a strangled noise as Maya began to cry more. The guilt was eating her alive, Scott could have died last night because she was too busy letting her hormones get the best of her.

"Hey, it's not your fault Maya." Scott tried to console his weeping friend. "Getting yourself and Jackson out of there, that's exactly what I wanted you to do."

His words only made the brunette sob harder, her hands shielding her puffy face from view. It felt like nothing Maya tried to do to help was ever the right thing to do. A vicious cycle that kept knocking her down no matter how many times she got back up. Maya Williams only ever tried to help and she always made things worse.

"I should have come back for you though! Instead of making sure you were alive, do you know what I was doing? Kissing Jackson. I was so preoccupied with him and the problems with my brother, I didn't bother to make sure you were okay."

Scott's eyes widened at her words, not expecting to hear that bit about Jackson. But that wasn't important at the moment. "Maya, don't blame yourself. There was nothing you could have done to help me, and even if there was something I wouldn't have wanted you there. Those hunters are dangerous and I wouldn't have wanted you to get hurt trying to help me." He placed a comforting hand on Maya's shoulder, rubbing it in what he hoped was a soothing manner.

A few stray tears slipped between her fingers, the little droplets splattering onto her jeans. Her hands slowly strayed from her cheeks, tracing the dark splotches marking the cloth. She sniffled while trying to blink back the tears. "Why does it feel like everything is falling apart Scott. My brother hates me, you've almost died, Allison's family is trying to hunt you and Derek down...It just seems like any time we try and make things better, we just make everything worse."

This time it was Scott that pulled Maya into a hug, trying to keep her from sinking back into hysterics. "We're doing the best we can Maya and that's all anyone can ask us to do." He held her tightly, trying to convince his friend-and himself- that everything was going to be alright.

After a few minutes, Maya pulled out of the hug. She scrubbed at her face with her hands, trying to make herself seem slightly put together. Fumbling with the keys, the Williams gave Scott a half smile. The McCall smiled back, understanding what that little smile meant. Scott knew that she needed to hear him say he didn't blame her.

It was a quiet drive when Maya first started back to the McCall house. The only noise was her radio softly playing some music. The world flashing by in a blurry image as the duo drove through the town.

"So...you and Jackson?"

"Yeah, me and Jackson." Maya hesitated, looking away from the road towards Scott momentarily. It was hard to gauge his reaction. "Are you mad?"

Scott let out a breath of air, "Does he make you happy?"

"Yeah, he does. It's been a lot of trouble, but I think he's going to make me really happy." Maya spoke carefully, afraid to hear what her friend thought. Most people's opinions didn't matter to her. But her family, Scott, and Stiles' opinions were everything to her.