Boy By The Sea • taekook

Nine

The sky is pale blue, soft clouds drifting idyllically, and the air is warm and filled with the smell of spring and weekend laziness. The grass under him is damp, peeking through around the denim jacket he's sitting on. Brooklyn bridge is sprawled out in all its glory in front of him, imposing limestone columns withstanding the test of time.

All around, old-fashioned carousel music is mixed with the laughters and clamor of families scattered throughout the park. The Grimaldi's takeout box is warm on his lap, bright red sauce and vibrant green strands of basil contrasting on the half-eaten slice of pizza.

And Jeongguk is right next to him, in a grey hoodie and dark sunglasses, eyes hidden under the black Yankees cap. His presence is assuring, in a way that Taehyung can't quite explain.

It all feels so perfect, too perfect like a dream that he would wake up from at any moment. A dream he doesn't deserve.

It's not your life, you can pretend, but not yours. The voice in his head whispers. The scenery glitches, and dark shades loom over the sky. Taehyung blinks it away forcefully and focuses on the little girl with the bright yellow balloon in front of him instead.

"Where did you get the balloon, sweetie? Can I have one please?" His voice is playful, eyes crinkled into smiling crescents.

The little girl lowers her head and hides her face into her shoulder, balloon vibrating in the wind.

"You have very pretty ribbons on your hair." Taehyung adds and watches as she giggles and runs away towards her parents.

Such a perfect moment, he sighs happily, feeling the warmth of the sun soaking into his skin, blinking hard again to stay in the moment.

"Guess what." He points at the antique carousel in the near distance, while nibbling on the pizza, "Never been on one before."

Jeongguk hums, "Me neither."

"What." Taehyung's voice raises a pitch, "Always figured you had the perfect childhood, all prim and proper with a million toys."

"Parents had business issues," Jeongguk responds plainly, "I wasn't born rich."

"Hmm, go figure." Another nibble of the pizza, Taehyung looks up at the train zooming by noisily on the bridge, "You and your friends all look like you've been loaded since forever."

Jeongguk replies, eyes hidden behind the dark sunglasses, "Well, both Yoon and I, our families have been around for a long time. Definitely an advantage - reputation in this circle goes a long way."

"Whatever that means, sounds nice though." Taehyung comments.

Jeongguk answers, after a short pause, "But when everyone knows you, there's also pressure to do well."

He looks unassuming in the casual clothing, but there's something in the way he carries himself - an innate confidence of knowing exactly what he wants at all times. "Seems like you do well enough though, not the losing type."

Taehyung can sense the curiosity in Jeongguk's gaze behind his sunglasses. Just when he is about to change the subject, he hears Jeongguk's response, "Six years of boarding school on my own, there was one thing I learned." Jeongguk turns back to face the shimmering river in the distance, "Success is mostly just stubbornness and luck.

Then his voice turns quieter, "Cant afford to lose anyways."

Taehyung tears at the edge of the pizza box. More questions come to mind, but the way Jeongguk's voice sounds, resolute and determined, makes Taehyung pause. Instead, he hears Jeongguk ask, "And you? Always lived in New York?"

Taehyung places the box to the side, and reclines into the damp grass, shielding his eyes from the sun. He runs through all the routine cover stories, but they all suddenly feel hollow. Taehyung clears his throat, and instead responds honestly, "Been everywhere. But always wanted to come to New York. You know, the city that never sleeps!" He waves his hand dramatically in the air, earning a chuckle.

"Where's everywhere?" A cautious lilt to the question. Taehyung can see Jeongguk's back, and tufts of black hair peeking through from under his cap.

Taehyung flips his hand back and forth into the sun, playing with the shadow his long fingers cast on his face, "Portland, San Jose, Pasadena, mostly on the west coast, I was apparently a "hard to place" case, whatever that meant." He mumbles mockingly, eyes squinting, "There was even a family in Illinois for a few years, so fucking cold."

"New York gets cold too."

"Yeah but..ugh." Taehyung shivers exaggeratedly, "Plus grandma always liked New York."

Jeongguk hums.

Between his fingers, Taehyung tracks the slow and mesmerizing drift of the clouds above, savouring the calming effect of the motion, "She always talked about it, when we lived in Cali. I wish we got to come visit together before she died..."

"How old were you when she passed away?"

"Ten, I think? If only I was old enough to make a living... could've saved myself from all those years of foster homes, fuck." The simmering frustration irritates him, memories floating to the surface, memories that he hastily pushes to the side.

Taehyung feels a hand on his arm, the touch is light yet firm. He looks towards Jeongguk and meets his gaze, "You did well. Made it on your own. Your grandma would be proud."

Taehyung feels his throat dry. He has the urge to hold onto the hand by his arm, but knows better. Instead, Taehyung laughs it off drily, voice deflated, "Pretty sure she wouldn't be proud of how I turned out. Not everyone is a success like you, or even have people that care."

Jeongguk turns to face him, and pulls off his sunglasses. The gentle gleam in his eyes makes Taehyung flinch. He looks away, pretending to be blinded by the sun, but Jeongguk's voice still seeps in, "My parents were never the lovey touchy kind, especially after the divorce. I was more concerned with keeping everything financially afloat anyways, couldn't even tell you when I stopped looking for approval."

Jeongguk's hand stays on his arm, face dark against the sunlight behind him, "You'd be surprised how much of a failure I think I am. You were right the first time we met, you and I, we're really not that different."

Something stirs within Taehyung, timid but urgent, making him finally reach out to brush against Jeongguk's hand. Taehyung's eyelids flutter, as the sounds of the world fade away. And for a brief moment, they are together, sharing a content silence reserved only for the two of them.