Starship Armstrong - Season 2

Part 44 - Imperator Galactica (VI)

McAfree emerged from under the table. She ran over to Dr. Kang and made sure he was breathing. When she saw that he was she checked his wound. McAfree squeaked with concern and her hands came away bloody.

McAfree started to root around in Dr. Kang's pockets in a panic. Finally she found whatever she was looking for. McAfree took the small flat white square she had removed from Dr. Kang's pocket, ripped something off the back, and applied it to the wound. There was a sizzling noise and the smell of burnt flesh as the entire square began to slowly absorb into Dr. Kang's skin.

Straining with effort she flipped Dr. Kang onto his other side where she could get at his entry wound. The plates and silverware jangled as his weight shook the table. McAfree took the other square and applied it to the other side of the wound.

McAfree was breathing heavily. She wiped some sweat from her forehead and got blood on it.

"That happens way too often!" she yelled at the unconscious Dr. Kang.

"McAfree!" croaked Mitzner, still lying on the ground "Is that you?"

"Yeah," replied McAfree "I just patched up the Doc. People shoot him a lot so he has countermeasures. He's still breathing so I guess better luck next time."

McAfree had walked over to where Mitzner lay, and now stood over her. It was shocking how little blood there was considering Mitzner's left arm was missing. McAfree would have been even more shocked if she knew what percentage of that blood was other people's.

"I knew he'd make it. Neither of us can die while the other lives," said Mitzner, grinning up at her "Because it is my destiny to kill him."

"It looks like you got it worse than Dr. Kang," said McAfree.

"I was outnumbered nine to one," said Mitzner.

"Which of the nine cut off your arm?" asked McAfree.

"I dunno," replied Mitzner "I think number three."

"Can you stand?" asked McAfree.

"Broken leg," said Mitzner.

"Marvelous," said McAfree "So what's your plan?"

"My plan was to break the will of the Emperor's guards to fight. My plan already succeeded, what's yours?"

"I don't have a plan!" insisted McAfree, a little too loudly "I'm not in a position to formulate a plan! I didn't even want to come here! This is well outside the scope of my expertise! There will be more guards any minute!"

"Sssh!" Mitzner hushed her "Calm down. Let's assess. I see no reason not to take this preening anal wart at his word that there's a tractor beam. Any escape plan is going to have to start with finding the controls for the tractor beam and disabling it. My leg is broken and Dr. Kang is out cold so that means you're our point woman."

"What does that entail?"

"You're going to do everything that involves standing up or having two hands."

"Obviously," agreed McAfree.

"So be that as the case I think we have only one card to play," said Mitzner.

"What's that?" asked McAfree, hope written all over her face.

"The Emperor likes you," said Mitzner.

"Gross," said McAfree, who made a face.

"Gross nothing, this is cool spy stuff," said Mitzner "Seducing the bad guy."

"Yeah I'm pretty sure it's just gross."

"Do you have a better way to get us out of here?" asked Mitzner.

"No," admitted McAfree.

"Then go suck up to your new boyfriend," said Mitzner.

"Why do I have to do it?" she asked.

"Because I just lost an arm and Dr. Kang isn't pretty enough," said Mitzner.

"Pfft," said McAfree, blowing up a strand of her hair "It just figures he'd be straight and have a conventional standard of beauty. Okay you owe me then, Mitzner."

"Okay," said Mitzner.

"I mean it," said McAfree "I'm going to really hold this over your head."

"Agreed," said Mitzner.

"Fine I'll go deal with the writhing cesspit of inbreeding and lead poisoning. I will somehow figure out how to get him to show me where he keeps his tractor beams."

"Don't say it like that," said Mitzner.

"Don't worry, I already have it all planned out," said McAfree "I'm going to get him thinking with the wrong head then tell him I like repulsors. He'll take me to the giant tractor beam for sure it's the same damn equipment."

"Subtle. Do you think he knows that much about tractor beams?"

"Well I would be hoping he does," admitted McAfree.

"Here's a better idea: convince him you like him, then tell him you're willing to stay if he lets us go."

"Well then you'll just leave without me," said McAfree.

"We won't leave without you," said Mitzner.

"I don't believe you," said McAfree, flatly.

"I promise you right now," said Mitzner "Even if every other asshole on that whole dumb ship wants to abandon you here I will come back for you."

"You don't have a plan B?" asked McAfree "Maybe involving computer?"

"Well I'm assuming you can shut down a tractor beam if you get access to the controls for it," said Mitzner.

"You assume correctly," said McAfree.

"Then plan B is find the room with the tractor beam controls, sabotage them well enough that it will take at least several hours to repair, break Dr. Kang and I out of the dungeon or hospital or hospital-dungeon this Emperor character will have us confined in, and help me hobble over to a shuttle while fighting off guards."

"Great. So how will I know where the controls are?" asked McAfree.

"Seduce the Emperor and ask him," said Mitzner.

"How is this your only plan?" asked McAfree.

"Can you fight with a halberd? Or silently kill people without being detected?" asked Mitzner.

"No..." said McAfree.

"Then I don't know what you want from me," said Mitzner "In the long term you might want to consider taking up some self defence training. In the short term you need to go convince the Emperor that you like him."

McAfree took a very deep breath.

"Fine," she said.

"Then we're golden," said Mitzner "So when the reinforcements arrive you surrender immediately. You can take it from there Special Agent McAfree."

"I'm not 4," said McAfree.