Summertime Madness

Chapter 11: Already?

It's been a long time since Josh told me he was leaving. I still have about three weeks with him until he gets picked up to go the the Army. I'm so devastated it's not even funny. I'm so in love with this dork. He is literally my first love.

(This is the part where you say 'Aawwwwww')

Anyway, the last time I saw Josh I was with him at the mall. When he first told me when he was leaving.

It's the morning of July 4 , and I was hoping that I would be able to spend the day with him, but I pushed my luck. Of course nothing will ever go my way, I'm always going to end up in a situation I had been trying to ignore.

I was in Josh's room when I looked at him, for some awkward reason, I leaned in closer to him. It was a really weird feeling, my nose was at his and our lips were really close together, but I didn't try anything. As I was leaned in I heard a little snicker, like he was either laughing or crying.

He was crying. I didn't really know why.

I had been trying my best to forget about Josh leaving, and not really put much focus on the subject. I was trying to avoid the fact that he was going to be gone soon. I was really trying to forget about the whole situation.

"Awe Josh why are you crying?"

"I'm not crying, I got dirt in my eyes."

"Josh there is absolutely no dirt in here, I would have believed you if you said dust; but you didn't. Just tell me."

"I don't want to tell you, I'll just start crying more."

"Josh just tell me, please."

"Ugh please Julie just forget it."

"Josh...."

"Okay fine, I'm going to be..."

Before he could finish talking the doorbell rang. We were both really confused becasue it was 5 am, who would be at the door at five am? We went downstairs with weapons in our hands; Josh had a bat, and I had a hammer. I was scared out of my mind.

When we opened the door two men were standing there. One was dressed in a suit and one was dressed in a uniform. I couldn't really see what kind of uniform he was wearing because it was still dark.

"Hello is Josh Matthews here?"

The man in the suit was speaking to us the whole time, and the other man in the uniform was just standing there.

"Yes, I'm him."

"Oh okay, hello Josh my name is Lieutenant Frank Williams. Next to me is one of my best soldiers, Oscar Rodriguez. I am here to inform you that you have 24 hours to get packed up and in your uniform that I have for you here."

Josh looked at me and I just rolled my eyes and walked away, I knew that he had known for a very long time already. This is the kind of stuff that I get annoyed with. Why can't he just tell me the truth and come out with it? I'm so frustrated with him. I was mixed with so many different emotions, I didn't even want to look at him.

I realized that I was on the couch for an hour and a half when Frank and Oscar finally left. Josh came behind me, kissed my head and went upstairs. I am so upset with him, but I ended up going upstairs with him anyway.

I walked into the room and he turned to look at me. When I made eye contact with him I got that feeling of love and compassion. I knew that he really loved me, and that he was regretting signing up. I knew he didn't want to leave. I walked up to him as just gave him a really big hug. When I was in his arms we both just started crying. It was one of the most confusing feelings I had ever felt.

"Are you okay Julie?"

"Yes I'm fine, why didn't you just tell me before."

"I didn't want you worrying about me."

"Josh I'm always going to be worrying about you, I love you. It's like you are telling me not to take care of me, you are a part if me."

"I'm sorry Julie I really am."

"I love you Josh as long as you know that. You will always be that puzzle piece that connects me to love. You are the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, I know that sounds cheesy but it's true."

He looked at me and started crying again.

"I love you so much too Julie, if only there was a way for me to prove it to you."

"You don't have to prove it to me, I will always believe that you love me, as long as you don't leave me permanently that is proof enough."

"I promise, I'll prove it to you."