*clears throat*
zainab, love of my life, friendship soulmate, best friend, super extreme idiot, you are not a bad person. let me tell you why.
22nd august, 2016.
new school, new life. it was hard. my family was going through a rough patch, and all of us were having mental breakdowns at least twice a day. i come to this new, tiny school with about three hundred people ONLY. big contrast to my old school, with its red brick building and at least a thousand kids, can't remember the exact estimate. i was lonely and bored on this first day of school because everyone was annoying and none of them read books.
"i don't like harry potter," said that one short haired girl.
"stupid muggles."
you have no idea what sort of light that filled me with. what sort of excitement, "WOW SOMEONE READ HARRY POTTER AND SHE CALLED THIS ANNOYING BRAT(sorry if you're reading this, ily) A STUPID MUGGLE FKDHSHDJ"
from that day onwards, zainab, from what i have seen, you have never, ever, e v e r not managed to cheer a person up. you make those awful, awful puns, laughing at them while everyone else pretends to look at a camera as if they were in the office.
i cannot tell you how many times i've been on the verge of crying, my throat closing up, tears about to spill out, when you've come and saved me. hugged me and told me that everything would be fine. you, with your bright smile and brave face, you, with your frown and your broken-hearted expression that sends a pang into everyone's hearts when they see it, because it is just that hard to see someone who deserves the world sad.
when you used to tell me about your family and their oddities, or you used to rant about t h a t guy, or cry to me about problems at home, all i could think of how such a good and pure person could always be hurting so often. you never deserved it. you still don't.
although you may not think so, you spread happiness. when you talk about the Northwood characters or when you talk about books or movies you've recently read/watched, your eyes and face light up in a way that immediately makes a person feel excited even if they didn't know what the thing was before.
so what if you have obsessive tendencies? you're not hurting anyone, are you? you're not being creepy. you're not doing anything wrong, babey girl, you're just being you!!! and i think you, as a person, are wonderful. hearing about the newest person you like, hearing about the newest show you're obsessed with is fun. it's hilarious to see you talking about it because you're so exhilarated and i have photographic evidence of this!!!
as far as i know, you don't have psychotic tendencies. being upset and being angry at someone or yourself and wishing harm on the person, it's normal. i'm guilty of it and so are many, many other people. you aren't crazy. even if you are, it's not in a bad way.
not to mention you're the prettiest person i've ever seen like wow?? how did a potato like me become friends with this absolute gODDESS DAYUM.
people are drawn to you because you have this 'aura' around you. i can't exactly explain it, but you're that type of person who is a people magnet of sorts because you have this beautiful face that looks simultaneously troubled and carefree. it makes a person want to know more about you. not to mention the pure and raw confidence that emanates from you like a beam of light that comes out ufos. that confidence. while you may think you don't have it, it is very evident and that is why so many people are attracted to you. you are powerful, not just with words, but in everything you do. you have unsaid things written in your eyes when you want to say something out loud which is correct but you can't say it. it's there for everyone to see and they agree with those words. they agree with what you say, because you know what you are talking about. you are the type of person who seems as if they understand the makings of the world, every cog that moves it, every person inside it.
you are a being of great intelligence, beauty, humour and talent. your flaws don't define you. they don't make you a bad person. everyone has flaws. that can't be changed. you're one of the best people i've met, and i'm proud to call such a brilliant and stellar human my best friend.
if these 800 words don't convince you, then, well, just know that i love you, and i will always be here, no matter if you think you're a disgusting person or not. know that to us, you're great, even if you're not to yourself.
