Invisible ― Jason Grace

v. camilla becomes a leo valdez fangirl

CAMILLA HATED LEO'S PLAN.

Camilla's plain white t-shirt had been vandalized with a black Sharpie to read ALL THE LADIES LOVE LEO. Hazel had drawn hearts on each of her cheeks with L.V. inside of each of them. 

She looked like a Leo Valdez fangirl, which was almost as embarrassing as hiding underneath a giant's butt to escape a horde of gryphons. 

"Jason's going to freak," Leo laughed to himself as he slicked his hair back with machine oil. He'd perched a pair of welding goggles from tool belt like sunglasses on his head, stuck a wrench in his back pocket (why, Camilla couldn't say), and even had Hazel draw a tattoo on his biceps with a marker: HOT STUFF, with a skull and crossbones.

"I hate this plan," Camilla grumbled. 

"Seriously," Hazel said, looking flustered, as if she was the one wearing DIY Leo Valdez merchandise. "What in the world are you thinking, Leo?" 

"I try not to think," Leo admitted. "It interferes with being nuts. Just concentrate on moving that Celestial bronze. Echo, you ready?"

"Ready," the nymph said. 

Leo took a deep breath. He strutted back toward the pond, and Camilla grudgingly followed. 

"Leo is the coolest!" Leo shouted. 

"Leo is the coolest!" Echo shouted back. 

"Yeah, baby, check me out!" 

"Check me out!" Echo said. 

"Make way for the king!" 

"The king!" 

"Narcissus is weak!" 

"Weak!" 

The crowd of nymphs scattered in surprise. Leo shooed them away as if they were bothering him. "No autographs, girls. I know you want some Leo time, but I'm way too cool. You better just hang around that ugly dweeb Narcissus. He's lame!" 

"Lame!" 

The nymphs muttered angrily. 

"What are you talking about?" one demanded. 

"You're lame," said another.

Leo adjusted his goggles and smiled. He flexed his less than impressive biceps, showing off his HOT STUFF tattoo. He had the nymphs' attention, if only because they were stunned; but Narcissus was still fixed on his own reflection. 

"You know how ugly Narcissus is?" Leo asked the crowd. "He's so ugly, when he was born his mama thought he was a backward centaur—with a horse butt for a face." 

Some of the nymphs gasped. Narcissus frowned, as though he was vaguely aware of a gnat buzzing around his head. 

Leo poked Camilla in the ribs. 

The daughter of Neptune sighed. "You know why his bow has cobwebs?" she asked loudly. "He uses it to hunt for dates, but he can't find one!" 

One of the nymphs laughed. The others quickly elbowed her into silence. 

Narcissus turned and scowled at Leo and Camilla. "Who are you?" 

"I'm the Super-sized McShizzle, man!" Leo said. "I'm Leo Valdez, bad boy supreme. And the ladies love a bad boy."

"Love a bad boy!" Echo said with a convincing squeal. 

Leo threw an arm around Camilla's shoulders. "And this is my entourage, Camilla. She'll tell you all about how much cooler I am than Narciss-ugh."