Chapter 24

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    Nicole found herself staring out the window again. Even though she had been sarcastic about the view she was starting to find it therapeutic. She was currently feeling annoyed because it was around 8:30 and she was hungry. She was about ready to call for some breakfast thinking Gray was not going to visit.
    There was a knock at the door. "Come in." Nicole called it while she stared out the window, figuring it was her nurse.
    "Morning Nicole."
    Nicole turned at the sound of the voice, "Gray?"
    "Sorry, I was hoping to be here earlier but the food took a little longer than planned." Gray said holding up a bag Nicole immediately recognized.
    "It's okay." Nicole answered with a huge smile.
    "It's actually me who should apologize." The woman who pushed Gray's wheelchair said. "I thought I knew where the food truck was but I was off by a few blocks and it took me a while to find it."
    Nicole nodded, "They actually have a new rotation of locations that started a couple weeks ago."
    Gray jumped in, "Nicole this is my friend Alex. You may or may not remember meeting her when you were admitted but she's a doctor here in the ER."
    "Nice to meet you again in a calmer situation Alex." Nicole said with a smile though her mind was focused on the food.
    Alex smiled, "Good to see you up and around Nicole. I'm sure we'll see each other again so I'll leave you ladies to your breakfast." She said then turned to Gray and gave her a wink and quietly said, "Be good."
    When Alex left the room Nicole said, "How did you... I mean who told you..."
    Gray laughed as she stood and walked towards Nicole with the food. "I told you I've got connections here."
    "You did mention that." Nicole said as Gray started pulling food out of the bag. "Thank you Gray."
    "No problem." Gray replied with a smile and sat down. "Let's eat before this get's cold!"
    Nicole nodded and started to unwrap the food Gray had given her. She was amazed that Gray managed to get her favorite foods from her favorite food truck. "Okay, you talked to Rachel right?"
    Gray shook her head and smiled but was unable to hide a slight blush.    Nicole completely missed Gray's blush, "Then how did you know this is my favorite breakfast, both place and food items?"
    "This may sound creepy but I noticed you bring this into work for yourself practically every shift." Gray admitted.
    This time Nicole noticed Gray's blush and joked, "Well I did randomly appear at 51 which could appear creepy so I can look past your potential creepiness, especially since we're talking about really good food."
    "You know Rafferty doesn't think you are a stalker anymore, right? And I never did." Gray asked seriously.    Nicole nodded and held her hand up because she had just taken a bit of her food. After a few moments she said, "I know. We had a good chat last night, I just felt like being a smartass."
    Gray smiled and nodded. They remained silent while they ate. Neither woman really knew what to say so they both welcomed the distraction of food.
    But eventually the food disappeared and they were left sitting beside each other with only the view from the window to distract them.
    Gray finally broke the silence, "Can I see how your shoulder is doing?"
    Even though her shoulder was in plain view, Nicole had made a conscious effort to keep her bandage free injured shoulder out of Gray's sight. But when she saw the concern in Gray's eyes Nicole just nodded and turned her back towards Gray.
    Gray carefully put a hand on Nicole's shoulder, "It's looking a hell of a lot better than the last time I saw your shoulder."
    Nicole nodded, "Your dad and Dr. Driver have been wonderful." She felt the need to show off a bit and moved her arm up and down, "My range of motion improves daily."
    Gray couldn't help but smile at Nicole's display, "I can see that, which is wonderful to see Nicole."
    Nicole turned towards Gray as she was speaking an saw her smile. She wondered if Gray knew what her smile did to her. Nicole knew that extreme situations did strange things to one's emotions and she was still unsure about what she was feeling. We're her current feelings fueled by her injury and Gray's injury or were they genuine?
    Feeling overwhelmed by her close proximity to Gray, Nicole stood up and stepped towards the windows.
    "I'm sorry Nicole." Gray quickly responded to Nicole's movement.
    Nicole quickly turned towards Gray and said, "Please don't apologize Gray. You have nothing to apologize for."
    "I beg to differ. I obviously made you uncomfortable." Gray replied.
    "A little but it has nothing to do with you exactly Gray." Nicole said.
    Gray laughed and asked, "You care to explain that?"
    Nicole sighed and said, "I guess it's time for the serious talk I promised."
    Gray shrugged as Nicole turned back to the windows. "If you want. I told you in the ambo from the fire to here, when you're ready I'm here to listen to whatever you want to tell me."
    "To start I can honestly say I've never really been a relationship type person." Nicole admitted. "I tend to say and do the wrong things which usually makes things end miserably. So I tend to avoid relationships as a general rule. Plus after I because a firefighter, that just added more of an issue. Women find it cool at first but then freak out about the danger and the hours, you know?"
    Gray laughed, "Yeah. I'm familiar with the concept."
    Nicole blushed a little, "Yeah that was kind of a dumb thing to say."
    "Don't worry about it," Gray said with a smile. "But I get the impression there's something bigger you wanted to talk about. Don't get me wrong, I'll listen to you making excuses as to why you don't like relationships but remember you can tell me anything."
    "Gee, glad to know my feelings are excuses in your eyes." Nicole mumbled.
    Gray laughed, "You're kinda cute when you get all defensive like that."
    Nicole looked at Gray, stunned for a moment but ultimately started laughing too.
    "So is that really what you wanted to talk to me about? You wanted to tell me that you're relationship phobic?" Gray asked when she stopped laughing.
    "Not completely but that was part of it." Nicole replied.
    "Okay." Gray said with a nod. "Well can we talk about that part a bit? I'm not planning on letting your tactic work Davin." She stated with a smirk.
    For the second time Gray surprised Nicole, "What tactic am I trying to use exactly?"
    "Saying you're not the relationship type to scare me off from getting to know you better. I'm not proposing or anything so you don't have to freak out and avoid me." Gray said.
    "That's not what I've been doing, exactly." Nicole replied hesitantly.
    Gray continued, "I know our conversation at Hopleaf made you uncomfortable and made things awkward between us for a bit."
    "Not exactly but it made me realize I needed to put some space between us. I didn't want to give you false hope." Nicole admitted.
    Gray thought a few moments before she spoke. As she looked at Nicole she wasn't convinced that Nicole believed what she had said completely, "Alright then, I have a question for you." Gray waited until Nicole looked up at her. Once Gray saw Nicole's beautiful brown eyes Gray asked, "Do you want to get to know me Nicole?"
    "What do you mean?" Nicole answered with another question.
    "It's a simple question really." Gray smiled when she saw the concerned look on Nicole's face. She continued, "The night we met we obviously got to know each other in a way but that's not what I'm getting at so relax. I'm thinking more the old fashioned, get to know each other type thing. From what I've heard it involves a bit of talking and an occasional meal together."
    "To what end?" Nicole asked.
    Gray shrugged, "Who knows? If you're willing we can see where things so and reassess as we go."
    Nicole laughed, "Really? That's what you're going with?"
    "Yes." Gray said with a smirk then explained, "I firmly believe things happen for a reason. I would never claim to understand why things happen the way they do but there's got to be a reason. If I didn't believe that I think I'd go crazy from what I've seen on the job."
    Nicole nodded, "I can appreciate the concept but it's not always easy to accept at times."
    "I get that." Gray said with a nod. "But that belief leads to what I think about us."
    "And that is?" Nicole asked.
    Gray laughed, "I thought this conversation was about what you wanted to tell me?"
    Nicole quickly answered, "Wait a minute, you're the one who wanted to talk about my issues about relationships and how that pertains to us."
    "True. I guess I didn't plan ahead on what I was going to say." Gray admitted.
    Nicole shrugged and offered, "We can move on to other topics if you want."
    "No I started this line of conversation. I'd like to see it through." Gray said hoping Nicole would agree. Gray wasn't sure what Nicole would think but she wanted to lay her cards on the table.
    Nicole shrugged, "Sure, my baggage can wait."
    "We all have baggage Nicole." Gray replied then second guessed what she was about to share, but quickly decided to not hold back. "About a month after we met I met a woman named Devon. She was the type of woman I usually end up falling for, hot with trouble written all over her face."
    Gray paused and looked up at Nicole who looked like she was about to say something so Gray quickly said, "You only fit half of that but no one ever said I was falling for you so don't look so worried."
    Nicole shrugged and nodded but didn't say a word.
    "Anyways, long story short that relationship ended horribly. She left without a word but with a good amount of stuff from the apartment I was sharing with Kyle and Cortez." Gray explained.
    "Ouch, that's cold." Nicole said.
    "Yeah that was rough and I decided to deal with it by drowning any feelings I may have had about anything. Going out to bars also kept me out of the apartment so I didn't have to deal with the boys. I even transferred out of 51 in an attempt to further avoid the guys. Problem was I barely showed up at the other house so that brought more attention from Kyle at least. I basically dove head first into a free fall and it nearly swallowed me up. But just as I was standing on a bridge feeling my crash to rock bottom Dawson found me and talked me out of ending it all."
    As Gray spoke she was also looking out the window so she didn't see the pained look that crossed Nicole's face.
    Gray shook her head, "Wow sorry that was a bit of a huge information dump. And be warned I'm just gonna get this out too then we can go from there cause I have to say it. I'm gonna lie, I'm attracted to you. There was something about you Nicole that stuck with me after we first met. Having said that, I'm interested in getting to know you. If friends is all we're meant to be, I'm okay with that."
    Gray finally looked at Nicole and saw the tears she was trying to hide. "Shit, what's wrong? What did I say wrong?"
    Nicole took a deep breath, "I need to tell you about what brought me to Chicago. You didn't say anything wrong but my reaction will make more sense once you know. Just give me a minute."
    Gray nodded, "Take all the time you need, I'm not going anywhere unless you tell me to leave."
    Nicole nodded and took a few deep breaths. She grabbed a napkin and wiped the tears from her face. After a few minutes of silence Nicole turned back to the windows as she said, "After I left your apartment I spent the day with my nephew Tyler. After he went to bed I drove back to Milwaukee cause I had to work the next day. Little did I know it would be the start fo the worst week of my life."

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