Build me a Daddy

Chapter Fourteen- Blessings

~One month later~

~~Luka's point of view~~

The last month has sucked. Pepper still brings Phoenix to me every morning, but she won't speak to me. I've tried to tell her I didn't plan it. She's blocked my number; I gave up; I love her more than anything. Seeing her every day kills me. I suck it up and move on. I have focused my attention on Phoenix.

Tim and I get along great. I didn't have a choice but to come back to my house. He didn't mind. We each have our own room, and Paxtyn has her room. We did it up all girly for her. If I manage to keep Phoenix overnight, he sleeps in my bed with me.

I was able to talk to Sebastian and have him talk Pepper into letting me take him back to Utah with me. I had decided to sell my parent's house because I have no intentions of moving back there. Tim and I packed the kids up and spent two weeks there. We stayed at my parents' house.

Tim got to see pictures which we brought back with us. I showed him my old house, and I took him to where the rock slide happened. I wanted him to see the life he never got to have. When packing the house up, we found a box. The box had all of Linton's (Tim) things in it. His outfit from the hospital, his baby pictures, and a journal my mom left.

She explains in it that they had me when my Dad was twenty-one, and my mom was nineteen. I knew that. Three years later, Linton came along, and they tried so hard to keep him, but my Dad has lost his job, and my mom had postpartum depression. They struggled with the choice to keep him and ultimately chose to give him up.

The journal didn't stop there. She wrote her thoughts while she had him and after she gave him up. I had no idea my mother had attempted suicide. She wrote about her experience. It was heartbreaking to read. We were two grown men standing in the room bawling like babies.

She went on to explain that two years after our Dad got the job that he worked at when they died. He quickly ranked in the company, and things got back to normal. She said they contacted the adoption agency, but they wouldn't give them any information. They knew the family that adopted Linton was from Utah, but they never knew who. Tim's adopted mom confirmed. She was from Salt Lake.

That she had met his Dad on a mission trip, and he moved there. They found out they couldn't have kids of their own and adopted him shortly after his grandpa offered his Dad a job at the family business, so they moved to Tennessee. They have been here ever since. Tim was just a baby, so here was all he knew.

They still refuse to see Paxtyn. That hurts Tim more than anything. He doesn't care if they don't want anything to do with him. It bothers him they want nothing to do with Paxtyn. His feeling is she is an innocent child. She asks about them a lot, and I know it hurt him.

We've explained to both kids were brothers, and they understand. I am Uncle Luka to Paxtyn, and Phoenix calls Tim Uncle Timmy. He has never corrected him. We just go with the flow as much as possible. We don't let them get away with anything; if they get in trouble, we correct them, but we let the small stuff go.

It helps that Tim and Sebastian are best friends. Just because Pepper and I aren't together means our relationship has changed. I still talk to him and Fawn daily. She is close to having the babies; they told her she would go the full nine months. She is tired of being on bed rest, though. I go see her when Pepper is at work.

I haven't taken my ring off. I know she hasn't either. I hold out hope that maybe there is still a chance for us. Just because I choose not to give her a hard time doesn't mean I don't love her. I love her more than anything. I just know she needs time. I will give her the time she needs.

Sebastian brought up the fact that we may have rushed things, and we may have. I would do it all over again. She isn't Camilla or Annalise. She is worth fighting for when the time is right. I did have to talk to Larry. As soon as he heard there was trouble, he tried swooping in. Sebastian said she turned him down repeatedly; he just kept asking. I had a little conversation with him, and there have been no more issues.