you can't help who you fall for

27

A/N: Uh.... I'm sorry?

It had been four months since I started Yale and I was settling in pretty nicely. Surprisingly, I've grown closer to Rory living apart in the last four months than I have sharing a room with her for eighteen years. I'm getting on really well with Lucy and Olivia, my roommates, because we have similar creative styles and our personalities really mesh well together.

I try to call Logan as much as I can but sometimes the calls don't go through or the timing's would get messed up and when we do manage to talk he sounds different. He was out partying every night but unlike Colin and Finn who were always rays of sunshine over the phone (no literally, I'm not even being sarcastic) Logan seemed just more reserved and solemn. So, after much deliberation, on the first call I'd been able to get with him in two weeks, I decided that enough was enough. I love Logan more than anything, but I can tell that being tied down by a girl he couldn't even see while his friends were doing whatever they wanted was making him miserable.

"Hey, Queenie! How are you? How's Yale?"

I swallowed and felt the tears leaving my eyes in anticipation of what I was about to say. "Logan, we need to break up."

There was silence on the other end for a moment. "What? What do you mean? Is there someone else?" His voice sounded broken but I just had to do it. He'll thank me for it in the end, I'm sure. I just want him to be happy.

"No there's, there's no one else. It's just you planned this trip with the idea that you could have one night stands with girls in every continent and party til dawn but you can't do that because of me, because you're a great boyfriend and you need to be sober enough to call me I'm the morning and it is eating you up. I want you to be happy Logan, that's all I've ever wanted. So I'm letting you go. I'm letting you be yourself, do the things that makes you happy. You don't have to stay loyal to me because we're not together anymore."

"Sierra, wait! You don't-"

"I love you. Goodbye Sherlock."

"No! Queenie!"

I hung up and the phone immediately rang again. I declined quickly before blocking his number and retreating to my room to wallow with the mint choc chip ice cream I'd bought earlier.

Halfway across the world though, Logan knew exactly what he was going to do and it wasn't going to include moping around in sweats.

***

Less than 24 hours later, I sat in a bralette and sweatpants writing an assignment for my drama class in the common room when there was a banging on the door to our dorm.

Lucy and Olivia had gone out to get coffee, promising to bring me an espresso back since I'd most likely be staying up all night at this point. However they both had keys and even if they'd been forgotten, neither of them knocked that vigorously.

I stood up and walked over to the door, opening it all the way and my heart stopped. With an arm raised, clearly about to knock again, Logan stood there bouncing up and down on his feet. "Logan, I-I thought you were in Santorini."

"I was but I had to come see you."

I got over my shock and gestured for him to come in and quickly closed the door behind him, feeling a chill from the outside. "Look, Logan-"

"Queenie, I love you. And I can't just let this end without telling you how I feel. You've said your piece, so please can you just let me say mine?"

I nodded and sat on the couch as the man nervously paced.

"Look, Queenie, I love you so much. I love you more than words can possibly express. I- I never thought I would or could love someone the way I love you. I think about you every morning when I wake up, you're the last thing on my mind before I go to sleep, hell you're even a constant presence in my dreams!" He paused for a second, looking at her as he saw tears come to her eyes. "You want me to be happy, don't you?"

I nodded. "Of course I do." That was all I ever wanted.

"You make me happy, Sierra. Before I met you I didn't do relationships, I certainly didn't do love and I had no idea how to be a good boyfriend! You broke up with me because you think the thing that makes me happy is one night stands and partying and that used to be the case, but it's not anymore! The thing that makes me happiest, more than anything, is you. I don't need anything else. I don't need other girls, I don't need alcohol, I don't need to make stupid decisions that'll probably get me arrested, all I need is you."

I couldn't stop the tears now flowing down my cheeks at his heartfelt confession.

"I never believed in love at first sight, I thought it was just some fairytale bullshit! Until I met you. From the moment I saw you at that coffee cart I knew you were different. You weren't some girl I could take to bed and then never see again. I took you on a date! I took you on multiple dates, I have never done that before. Because the truth is, Sierra Gilmore, from the moment I laid eyes on you I was enraptured. I wanted to do nothing but talk to you and see you smile, because that is the most beautiful thing in the world."

I couldn't stop myself from smiling at that, which he returned tenfold, pointing at me. "See! That right there. I would fight wars for that smile, that is the thing that turns me into some puppy dog lovesick idiot when I'm around you! You and that smile are the only thing that could ever get me to fly coach from Santorini to New Haven! I would risk everything for you and it wouldn't matter because I'd have you. That's all I need. Nothing else. So please, please tell me that you love me too because I don't know what I would do without you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you Sierra. I wanna spend the rest of my life taking you to all these places you've never been, and waking up next to you and watching Disney movies with you curled up in bed! I go crazy just thinking about you. You are the greatest thing that has ever happened to me, and if you think I'm gonna give that up without fighting for you, and for us, then you're wrong. I would go to the ends of the earth for you."

I sat there, trying to keep myself composed as all the cogs turned in my brain.

He stopped pacing and looked at me, his eyes pleading. "Please just say something."

I finally looked up and there he saw it, the smile that apparently melted his heart. "Just come over here and kiss me, Sherlock."

I stood up and met him halfway, our first kiss after months apart feeling somehow even more magical than all of the others combined.

A/N Ok so I got the idea for this at like 1am when I was in my bathroom and i just improvved the entire scene in front of my mirror (don't ask) so I had to rush and get this written as quickly as possible. Did this break up have a point? No but I don't like long breakups mainly because I have no idea how to write them hence why both times Logan and Sierra have broken up (which they need to stop doing) it has lasted less than a chapter before they go crawling back to one another.
What we have learned from this is that Logan is a simp and I still need to rewatch Gimore Girls but to be honest I'm thinking I'm gonna skip the rest of the series finish it up with the graduation scene as an epilogue.
So that will probably be the next update and then this book will officially be over.
Thanks for reading! Sorry it was such a long wait <3