beauty in death | christian anthony

fifth day.

— fifth day.

oh, i don't wanna end up on the news,
these self-inflictions tend to cut me loose.

NOW PLAYING

Chase Atlantic - BEAUTY IN DEATH

01:30  ━━━━━━●───────  04:24

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you were in the car with clinton on the way back from the hospital, the music was off and you were playing with your ring again.
"so.. it's obviously not curable. because.. no researches have been done for a cure yet. „
clinton was just listening to everything you were saying about your discussion with your doctor.
" and.. i.. „

your breath got stuck in your throat again and clinton decided to stop on the side of the road, turning to face you. his hand landed on your arm, stroking it nicely and encouraging you to keep going.
"i'm part of the 10%. „

clinton's hand movements stopped abruptly at your words and the way his expression switched made your heard ache terribly. seeing your best friend with an extremely pained look on their face would hurt anyone, especially when it's because of something you couldn't control.
"what..? but.. is it.. are they /sure/ of it ?
- hmhm. you nodded, still trying to believe it yourself.
- do they know when ? like.. do they know how many days you have left ?
- no, we don't even have a clue of when the illness manifested in my body so.. no.. „

you both stayed very silent for a few minutes before you felt yourself crying. but it was still silent in the car, you were sobbing silently while clinton's hand was stroking the back of your head in a comforting manner, still trying to believe it too.
"i will try to tell christian tomorrow, since he's out with mitchel today..
- yeah, okay. „ he was nervously biting his lower lip, starting to worry about his friend's reaction.

the rest of the day went painfully slowly ; clinton was busy working on the band's new album and the two other boys were not at home. you didn't even ask them where they were going, feeling stupid when you realized it.
you were just bored in your bed for the whole afternoon, laying in the middle of it while listening to some calm music and staring at the ceiling, asking yourself why did something like that happened to you ? you also cried a lot. but never paid attention to the tears staining the pillowcases under your head.