MAGOS ACADEMY: The Magician's card

CHAPTER IV

     If someone in this room asks me when the last time I hid my emotions, I'll say without hesitation, "Now."

     Today is the day I will be departing. We all woke up earlier than usual to pack my belongings. Which only consists of toiletries, my undergarments and socks, formal and casual dresses, some sleeping gowns, and, well, my books. It is said in the letter that it isn't really necessary to bring anything because the academy will provide us with everything, but my mother still insists.

      It is also said in the letter that I will be given school supplies for free, courtesy of the academy itself. That's the thing I don't understand the most. Yes, I am a new student, and yes, I am not that fortunate enough to attend the academy and pay my tuition. But that doesn't mean that they can treat me as a scholar. I am no scholar, and I am definitely not a charity case.

     No, I am more than a charity case.

     I have aspirations. I have goals. And I will surely achieve it.

     "Will you be alright?" Lula had asked me earlier. Which I replied to with a small nod.

     I really don't know what I'm feeling right now. Hence why I hid it. Inside me was a whirlwind of emotion, waiting to get out.

     Today will be a new beginning. Today marks my independence. I will no longer have my family beside me. Physically, that is. Because I know that no matter how far away they are from me, they will always stay by my side. Mentally, that is.

     I really don't know what will come to me once I arrive at the castle. I also don't know when I will be coming back here, to my family, my home.

     My mother, who insisted on tying my hair in a twin braid, said, "Promise me you'll be alright."

      Once again, I just nodded.

     I don't have any idea why I can't seem to find my voice whenever they ask or tell me to be alright. I am alright. I will be alright. And I want them to know that they do not need to worry. But at the same time, I also want them to worry. I mean, worrying means that they care for me, right? And I might sound selfish right now, but I do really want them to care.

     "Please, Estelle, don't make this any harder. Tell your mother that you can manage your own now. Don't just stay silent," Father said as he put down my luggage on my bed.

     My father might sound like he does not care, but the truth is, he was the first one to break into tears this morning. He may not show it to me, but I do hear him from earlier. They were inside their room, whispering to each other, and then, together, they cried. They might think that I do not hear it, but what do they expect? The walls are not that thick.

      Lula, who was usually loud, was unexpectedly silent. She was sitting on the window sill; her mind was clearly floating in the air.

     I do not like this.