I Thought I Would Never Love You

Chapter 3: Heartache

Summary:

Life never gives us any promises, but when something happens in our lives, we tend to overthink things. Zee is devastated. Nhu's life hangs in the balance, and his mind is racing with solutions. His dreams, Nong P, and his life all hang in the balance because of Nhu. What will he do? How will he cope? Will his own crew help him decide he needs to make it through?

Zee sat on the floor, devastated. How could Nhu's life be hanging in the balance? He had just met him a few hours ago and realized he didn't want to live in a world without him.

This sweet and loving person named Nhu, who cared more about how everyone around him felt watching him die than worrying about himself, was something he and his crew had never experienced in all their years on the job.

There was a time when his parents talked to him about special envoys who touched this earth to give hope and love. After seeing Nhu struggle and push past the pain to confess and soothe him, he was convinced that Nhu was sent to enrich their lives. But what was the purpose? Was he sent just for him? His entire crew? Did it matter? He did know a few things for sure.

He was firm in his feelings; he truly and deeply loved him in those moments. The room was like a bubble. Nothing could have taken their eyes away from the stunning boy dying, pouring his heart out, and pleading for promises for the next life.

But would something so intense last forever? Zee needed answers to so many questions, but if Nhu left him alone in this world, he would never know them. Was it to remind him of the obligation and promise he made to himself about Nong P?

That could not be it, could it? He couldn't let something like this change his direction. No matter the reason, his dream for his country, people, and firefighting family would always come first. He would not give it up, not even for love, But....

He could still see the stunned look on his brothers' faces when he looked around the waiting room. He was right there with them. This was all so surreal. Zee's head turned when he heard whispering.

He was not intentionally trying to listen, but he heard, nonetheless. He was shocked that the conversation was about him.

Josh told Latte and Gems how special he felt Nhu was and hoped that Zee would hold tight to this gift and cherish it. Gems thought he deserved happiness, not servitude to his dream. But one statement from the youngest recruit, Latte, tore Zee's heart in two.

"He would never accept such a gift; he will deny and destroy the blessing from the heavens he earned for his good deeds. I don't know whether to feel happy for us or sad that he could lose the one person the heavens prepared for him. For what? To further his dream? If Nhu were mine, I would love him with all I had. Hold him tight and never let go. I would never miss this opportunity to find the one I have been searching for," Latte lowered his voice so low that Zee almost missed it.

Even the crew had fallen in love with Nhu today. Zee felt a surge of jealousy course through his body at the thought of someone else having feelings for what was his. He could never stand someone close to him being with the man he knew belonged to him.

He felt something so petty as jealousy when he was ready to throw it all away for his dream or, even worse, for Nong P.

Nhu deserved more than that. He didn't want to admit that someone had broken through all his defenses and set up residence in his soul. He was just afraid to think it or say it. But his whole being was screaming for him to claim him, to brand his name in his heart.

He fought it. He would never stop fighting it, screaming about how unfair it was. But he could not resist the terror he felt right when his eyes shifted back to the operating door.