I Thought I Would Never Love You

Chapter 5: Love Hurts

Summary:

Zee waits to hear the news. Nhu is in dire straights, his heart stopping three times on the table, and Dr. Smith refuses to give up. Thomas is angrier by the minute; he needs to lash out, but there are too many around his precious Nhu. That is until Zee collapses, which takes all the men away from the one he needs to get to.

Chapter Text

Zee was ready to lose his mind; two hours had passed since the doctor he begged to save Nhu had entered the room. Why was this taking so long? It was like his whole existence hung in the balance.

Even in the worst fire he had ever been and almost lost his life, did he ever feel this out of control and out of sync? This was not adrenalin; these feelings were something far more profound, intense, and not easily controlled like other emotions.

In those moments with Nhu, he felt complete and whole for the first time since he was fifteen. Why did Nhu have to be hurt so badly?

All he could do was helplessly watch as medical staff ran to and from the room. He almost threw himself at the door again when he saw a team leave the room covered in blood. Zee knew he would fail like his last attempt and held himself in his chair, his body shaking with rage.

Zee loved his brothers, but they were holding him back. He needed to be with Nhu. He knew if this kept on for much longer, he would throw up. He was used to stressful situations. He lived for them, but this... was far different.

"Why haven't they come to update us?" Zee whispered while looking around the room at his crew as tears began slowly falling down his face.

This hit him right in the heart. He had always believed that he would be a strong husband with broad shoulders, but when put to the test by his future husband, he had failed him.

He was falling apart. When he thought of his future life with his spouse, he never thought of this. How could these crazy, wonderful, scary, hurtful feelings consume him?

Zee always thought that the person he would spend his life with would occupy a small corner of his heart and life. How could it be like this? All these years, he claimed to be in love with Nong P.

This had never been a problem. Never did Zee's feelings or thoughts of Nong P intrude on his everyday life unless he wanted them to. He realized in this moment that the person in the room dying was his whole world.

Instantly, their eyes met in that broken house with the smell of smoke. Zee was the sun that orbited Nhu's world. He needed to be in his life. Unbelievable. His life... This wasn't very easy. He had so much to accomplish before he was ready. He needed more time!

He could not lose him! Solve one problem, then the next, his heart screamed, but his mind betrayed him and kept slamming one thought after another at him.

How much more could he take? He felt his heart break at the thought of losing Nhu. What had he done? He was so stressed. He had resigned himself to the torture of waiting.

He still had a hard time coping with the fact that he had fallen in love in the space of a few seconds. He never thought he would fall in love like this again.

Why at first sight? Why now? He needed time. He needed to get his life in order before he could take care of his future husband.

He kept reaffirming to himself that he needed to ask his soulmate for four years to straighten out his life and complete his life's work. Was he being selfish? No, he had to, but should he? His mind screamed again, "No, I must ask for time. His heart said no, hold on tight."