Chapter 9

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Life. A rollercoaster of emotions. Even in times of trauma, we try to maintain a sense of normality until we no longer can. I called that surviving. We never become truly whole again when we experience trauma, instead we are survivors. Most people, they have these near- death experiences in life, a rude awakening call. They go through a tunnel and they meet the bright light at the end of it. We can lose anyone at the click of our fingers.

And I nearly did that day.

Four laps away from victory, four laps away from securing his third victory of the new season. He was almost six seconds ahead of everyone, taking every corner at high speed.

Too high.

My heart dropped to the soles of my feet as the cloud of smoke and flames appeared in front on me on the screen. Charles car smashed in pieces.

What the fuck just happened?

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Four months earlier.

Christmas had been and gone within the blink of an eye. It was my favourite time of the year, everyone gathered happily around there families, the gift exchanging and seeing the joy on their faces, eating your entire body weight then sitting down to watch whatever festive movie was being broadcasted on the TV that day. I especially enjoyed the run up to Christmas though, the bustle of people in the shops doing last minute shopping, the lights on display at night from rows of houses and the Christmas music being played at any given opportunity. I just loved it. Charles and I had managed to FaceTime each other a few times over the holidays, but our schedules had been so busy it felt like forever since I'd last heard from him.

Once I had climbed into bed on Christmas day after all the chaos had settled, my phone started ringing next to my head. I reached behind me and grasped my phone from the pillow. Charles name was printed boldly at the top and I didn't hesitate to answer.

"Merry Christmas Luce" he said as his face appeared on my screen, it looked like he was also in bed. There was no time difference between Cannes and Monaco so calling each other never really was a problem at night. I smiled sleepily "Merry Christmas Charles"

"Did you have a good day?" He rested an arm behind his head as he got comfortable. The only source he had was the light coming from my phone. The lights in my room were still on and I didn't have the effort to get up and switch them off. "It was great apart from when my mum nearly burnt the Turkey"

Charles's chuckle came through my speaker softly as he closed his eyes slightly. I could tell he was tired. Probably just as tired as I was but he still made the effort to talk to me, and I was grateful. "It's not Christmas until something like that happens" I laughed slightly. He wasn't wrong.

"What about you? Was your Christmas just as fancy as the place you live in?" A loud chuckle bellowed from him, he'd found it amusing that ever since I'd left Monaco I'd occasionally rip into him for how fancy the place was. "I wouldn't go that for but it was pretty special spending some time with my family"

"And have you started packing for Italy yet?" It was just a few days ago Charles had told me he was going to the Italian Dolomite Mountains to begin training for the new season that started in February. "Yeah we fly out on New Year's Day, Andrea said it'll just be non stop from then on". I nodded my head. "Yeah I can imagine, you're built for this stuff though" I said back.

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