Heal Me

Chapter 26

She grinned happily and put the book in her hand back on the shelf. Evangeline was so excited about the fact that her determination to be there for Damon, no matter how much he would push her away, really paid off through something as important as stopping his nightmares.

She had never wanted to think otherwise, she had never let her mind wander around the idea that doing all those things with and for him were just a waste of time, but it still came as a surprise to her when he so openly confessed that she had indeed helped him, partly fulfilling what she had set out to do.

And now she couldn't help but relive the moments when he had seen her in that white dress at the Halloween party and called her an angel for the first time and they danced together, or when he bought cappuccinos for the both of them and took her to the small hill, where he displayed so much affection towards her, or the night before today, whilst he was driving her home and Evangeline enjoyed his presence and the silence...

All of those moments replayed in her mind because in all of them she felt the same emotion running through her veins as she did now, the same rush of adrenaline in the pit of her stomach, crawling quickly up to her heart and making her want go up to him and hug him and feel his arms around her waist, warming her up and protecting her. And she would have liked it to last for as long as possible.

Evangeline had no idea what this emotion was, though, but maybe that was because she did not pay much attention to it and didn't really take the time to think about what it could mean. But she recognized it in all those situations and, just by looking at Damon's boyish, grateful smile, she noticed it was gnawing at her insides in this very moment as well.

And that peck...

The slow, sensual kiss in the dimly lit street, outside 'The Dark Pub'...

The slightly faded smell of alcohol in his breath...

The wicked sweetness of his lips...

'Why can't I freaking forget about that damn kiss?' she wondered inside her head and bit her lower lip to prevent any more similar thoughts running through her mind.

"Eva?" Damon said, frowning at the concentrated expression on her face. Her head snapped up at him and she smiled sheepishly, a very light blush covering her cheeks. She should not recall those moments ever again. She and Damon were just friends and she did not wish that to change.

"Zoning out?" she asked, cocking her head a bit to the side.

"Yeah." he nodded and went to take a clean towel from the bed to dry off his still wet hair.

"Sorry..." Evangeline said simply whilst flipping through the pages of another book that caught her eye from one of the shelves.

Sitting down on the bed, Damon began rubbing the towel through his hair to absorb all the water. After a couple of moments, though, his arms got tired because he was holding them above his head and it was harder for the blood to run upwards through his veins. So he brought his arms down to relax his muscles a bit and that's when Evangeline noticed it.

"Let me." she said, walking up to him smiling, and took the towel from his hands before he could say anything. Slipping off her shoes quickly and leaving them on the floor, Evangeline climbed up the bed and kneeled down behind Damon, engulfing him in the warmth of her body.

"Y-you don't have to..." he stuttered embarrassedly as she began massaging the towel through his now very soft and silky hair.

"You'll catch a cold otherwise." she smiled and continued drying off his dark-hazel hair, soothingly and delicately rubbing small circles into his scalp, going from the back of his neck to his temples and his forehead. After a couple of seconds, though, he sighed:

"She always did this to me when I was a kid..."

Evangeline's hands stopped moving and her smile disappeared from her beautiful face as she  let her arms rest on his shoulders.

"Do you want me to stop?" she asked quietly because it somehow pained her to see how much she reminded him of his mother. She wanted him to move on, not hopelessly dwell on the past that has been consuming him all this time. But how could he do that when her mere presence brought him memories that he yearned to relive even if  just once more?

"...No." he replied after a few moments.

"I don't want to catch a cold." Damon mimicked her with a smile on his lips and closed his eyes to enjoy the feeling of her warm hands through his hair. Evangeline scoffed but continued quietly, that is until she asked him about the nightmares.

"What did I do to stop them?"

He frowned and opened his mouth to speak, but closed it in lack of a good answer. After a couple of moments, though, he inhaled and replied:

"I guess... just being you...." he shrugged and let out the breath he was holding.

"I wish I had an exact answer, Eva. Maybe it's because I told you what happened and... let it all out. All I know is that I have been having nightmares for four months straight. Every single night, no exceptions... That is, until yesterday; I didn't dream anything at all." he said, fidgeting with his fingers on his lap.

"So the only logical explanation for that must be... you." Damon looked down and smiled sadly.

"Oh..." she whispered to herself. She had no idea that his nightmares were so often. No wonder he was so tormented and lost...

"What were they about?" she managed to ask a bit later.

"There actually wasn't a 'they'. It was the same one, but it just replayed itself every night..." he gulped. "It was about the crash."

"Uhm... Well, it's great you don't have them anymore." Evangeline forced a smile even though he could not see her, as his back was facing her.

"Yeah..." Damon murmured hesitantly because he always thought those nightmares were his rightful punishment. It only seemed fair to him that he should live with the consequences of what he had done that day. He still could not forgive himself...

"I'm glad you let me be there for you." Evangeline said sincerely and finished drying off his hair, throwing the wet towel on the bed and properly sitting down. He exhaled and they simply sat like that for a few moments, before she broke the silence:

"Can I tell you now?" she murmured nervously and looked down, embarrassed. Damon frowned at her confused for a second then realized what she was talking about; he had forgotten about the so-called deal they made but now his curiosity was piqued again.

"Of course. But only if you want..." he assured her, yet inside he was dying to know.

 "I do." she said and laid down on the bed, staring blankly at the ceiling.

And from the eagerness she showed in telling him everything the day before, Evangeline was now numb from the contradictory feelings she was experiencing. She knew she had to tell him eventually and keep her end of the deal, but she was scared. She had no idea of what, though, because there were so many things: reliving the past once again, getting into a depression, feeling sick of herself like she did on Halloween, Damon seeing her differently...

But she took a deep breath and decided on the best thing to do.