Heal Me

Chapter 31

Evangeline reached an arm behind her to steady herself and lean against the car, as she was left amazed by the thoughts that involuntarily ran through her mind just seconds before…

Drowning into each other’s eyes, Damon caressing her cheeks, closing in painstakingly slow and finally pecking her lips in a blissful, short kiss. 

Imagining those scenes over and over again, she could feel her whole face heat up in embarrassment and anger; anger towards herself, towards that sinful thing inside her that tried to make her succumb to the dark desires of the body and force her soul to kneel and plead for her cravings to be fulfilled.

“Eva, are you okay?” his voice came as out of nowhere, reaching her ears and reverberating through her whole being. “Eva?” Damon asked again, softly gripping her arm.

“Yeah…” she breathed, her eyes flickering down to where he was holding her. “I think it’s just a headache.” she lied, forcing a smile to make the whole thing more believable. Easing her arm out of his grip, Evangeline slipped past by him and opened the trunk to get out the blankets, and a couple of moments later he was beside her, watching her intently.

Her previous plea still echoed in his mind... he only wished to know if ordinary people like him and her were gifted with the power to forgive so much... to forget such a wretched past and such horrible people. He did not believe he could do as she said and leave it all behind, as forgiveness was for the strong ones and he was not like that. But then again, perhaps he had never been strong; perhaps his mother's death was just something that opened his eyes and something he wouldn't have met Evangeline without.

"Did you forgive him?" Damon said lowly, a frown making its way up to his face. She flinched a bit and exhaled in the cold air as she started shaking again, her fingers trembling and involuntarily forming into fists and her breath coming in short pants. Regret washed through him and he caught her by the hands and pulled her towards him, wrapping himself around her.

"I'm such an idiot." he murmured more to himself than to her, now damning his curiosity.

"You're always shaking when you're about to cry..." Damon leaned in to whisper in her ear and rest his chin on her right shoulder. That's how he felt her breath hitch and he smiled sadly. "You don't have to lie about it anymore, Eva. I know."

"No, I'm-"

"I am tired." Damon cut her off. "Of everything... of you saying that it's okay. It's not..." he continued, running a hand through her hair, just like she sinfully desired. And him holding her so close to him made similar thoughts run through her head.

Her whole body ached for him; her hands itched to be set free to touch him, to caress his naked skin and relish in the smell of his manly cologne, her lips longed to meet his in a passionate kiss. But although before her eyes flashed images of them gazing at each other in love and lust, undressed and tangled underneath the sheets, sweat covering their bodies and sounds of pleasure and release echoing in the cozy bedroom, Evangeline knew she shouldn't and wouldn't pay any attention to her desire for Damon, because only thinking about it made her feel guilty; she had to stop this erotic frenzy she was captive in.

And as she whimpered lowly and pushed herself out of his hold, Evangeline wondered what was wrong with her. She had never felt like this before and Damon being her friend didn't help at all.

"I'll take these by the fire." she composed herself and tried to deprive her voice of any emotions as she turned her back to a confused Damon.

~

"You should tell him that I'm sorry." Caleb said silently, looking down. Evangeline's eyes flickered to him and then to the car which Damon leaned against with his phone in his hands. Next to him, Rose was trying to turn up the radio and see if there was any music.

"I'm not the one who made a mistake." she finally sighed, sipping some tea from a thermos. "He'll forgive if you just talk to him. I know he has it in him."

"Oh, really? And you know him so well, right?" he bit sarcastically.

"I actually do." Evangeline eyes darkened as she glared at Caleb. "I'm just doing you a favor."

He frowned and looked down again. After a couple of minutes of sitting in silence, though, he got up and strode towards Damon, leaving her with a knowing smile on her face.

~

"Is everything alright now?" she murmured to Damon as all of them came by the fire and sat down around it, the radio humming in the background.

"I'm not sure." he whispered back, staring deeply into her eyes, unaware of the others. He felt like she was the only one there, the only one he could and wanted to see. He could have watched Evangeline for days and, as the same unusual feeling crawled up at the pit of his stomach, Damon longed to smile with her again.

Later in the night, while gazing at the starry sky and warming up next to the dying fire, all of them felt at ease. Maybe it was from the fresh air or the color of the sky, or, perhaps, the soft tunes coming from the radio which was fixed on top of Rose and Camille's car, the warmth of the blankets and, yet, their frozen noses, the tea they drank or the jokes they cracked. They were in a blissful state of tiredness, yearning for an eternity like this to be theirs.

Not all of them were happy; some were broken, yet content with how similar the moment was to happiness. And right then, it took Evangeline just one glance at Damon to tell that his smile was finally a whole-hearted one; she felt like nothing, not even the fading memory of that day, could made her cry anymore.