The Only Truth (Gilmore Girls)

Up In The Air

Rory watched Logan leave the room and heard the door slam downstairs. She didn't know where he was going to go but she didn't feel in any mood to follow him. She waited up a little to see if he would come back but after more than an hour had passed, she just couldn't keep her eyes open any longer and she drifted off to sleep.

She had been really surprised by the whole conversation and his reaction, not even being aware that it was something he might have been thinking about. Sure, she had thought about having more children at some point, she was pretty confident it was a certainty, but she had never really thought about when that might be or how far into the future she was actually thinking this would be.

A little while later Rory woke up when she heard Logan come back into the bedroom and slide into bed next to her. He didn't say anything as he pulled the covers up and so she turned around to face him in the bed to speak to him.

"Logan...I..." she started to say before he interrupted her.

"Forget it, Rory," Logan said turning over in the bed with a sigh "You made your feelings clear enough, we don't need to go over it all again. It's fine."

Rory sat up in bed and turned the light on.

"No Logan, it's not fine. We're not just going to gloss over this and stew about it for days on end. I want to deal with it now" she said firmly.

Logan looked at her and sat up in the bed.

"Logan, listen to me. I love that you want to have another baby, I really do and one day, when the time is right, I definitely want to have more children with you, hell we can have a whole hockey team if that's what you really want, but we're still so young. I'm still doing my PhD and I've not even begun to establish a career yet. I've already put everything on hold once, I'm not sure I want to do it again so soon" she said before she added, "This affects me so much more than it affects you."

"I don't know what you want me to say Rory," Logan said as he threw his hands up in the air.

Rory bit her lip. She didn't know what she wanted him to say either. She felt like they were at a bit of an impasse and she didn't like it one little bit.

"I don't think we're going to resolve this tonight..." she trailed off "...but I just wanted you to know that it's not because I don't want to have any more children, it's just that I'm not sure I want them yet. I love you Logan" she said as she gently touched his face with her hand.

"Okay" Logan forced a small smile. "Look, we're both tired, let's just go to sleep," he said as he lay down and closed his eyes.

Logan didn't know why her response to having another baby had affected him so much. He understood her reasons for not wanting to but it didn't mean that it didn't hurt him any less. Rory had seemed adamant that this wasn't what she wanted and he wasn't about to spend any more time trying to convince her that it was something they should do. He had to trust that when the time was right, she'd let him know.

Rory looked over at him and sighed before she reached over and turned off the light.

------

The next morning when Rory woke up, Logan was already downstairs having breakfast with Lily. Rory walked into the kitchen feeling slightly awkward. She wasn't really sure what the lay of the land was and the atmosphere in the kitchen was slightly unsettled. She did feel a little better however when Logan came over to where she was stood to fetch himself a cup of coffee to go. As he said goodbye he leant over and kissed her on the top of the head before he left the house for work.

Rory stood absentmindedly nibbling on a bagel as she stared out of the French doors into their garden. She was so sure last night that Logan was being a complete ass about it all but now in the cold light of day she wondered if she wasn't partly to blame for their current deadlock situation. She really needed to talk it over with someone – someone unbiased. Lorelai was out of the picture as Rory knew she would instinctively jump to her defense so she picked up the phone and called Lane. Lane might well be one of her very best friends but she knew that her friend would always be honest and truthful with her.