I Am Ruined (TDA Lord of Shadows Sequel)

[ XXI ] Trapped in your Own Mind

Mark laid on the bed in his room, pressing a pillow tightly over his face. The pounding in his head was still there, keeping him from sleep. After Ty had hugged him in the hallway, Mark had apologized, his brother simply nodded and patted his shoulder. He didn't know what got into his little brother to cause the interaction, but he didn't care. He was so relieved that he felt exhausted now. He groaned into the fabric, fumbling on the nightstand for his stele before a voice broke his concentration.

"Someone looks comfortable." It was Cristina, the sound of her voice like caramel, "You know another irtatze won't help as much as a good old-fashioned ice pack." He pulled the pillow off and into his lap as he sat up.

Cristina was in pink pajama shorts and tank top with white stripes. And in her hand was an ice pack wrapped in a towel, she extended it towards him and he took it with a smile. "Thank you, Tina. I'm very grateful." She sat on the bed next to him and brushed his soft blonde hair back. It slid through her fingers like silk and she remembered what it was like to run her fingers through it.

She pulled her hand back into her lap and sighed, "I'm worried. About Julian."

His gaze shot up to meet hers at the mention of his brothers name and he dropped the ice pack into his lap, "You- you don't think this is the curse, do you?" Her silence was enough of an answer. "Cristina, I don't know how long you have known Julian, but he has always had a little bit of a temper, especially when it comes to the family."

"But you are his family, Mark! And he hurt you."

He shook his head, "I was gone for years, I don't think Julian truly thinks of me as much of a brother anymore."

Cristina looked taken aback, her expression full of disbelief, "How dare you say such a thing, Mark Blackthorn. I may not have known Julian very long, but I was around when he found out you were coming back from the Hunt. The things he did to keep you around, the way he broke down when he thought you might leave again."

"I worry about him too. I was his big brother, and now that I'm back I am more a burden to him than anything. I fear he resents me for it." The room was quiet, dim save for the slight illumination from the bedside lamp which made Cristina's eyes shine such a light brown it was almost amber.

"He does not resent you, he loves you. He can be hard on you sometimes, but he doesn't mean to be. He has raised these kids with Emma since he was 12 and I think when you came back he remembered you taking care of him. He thought he could share a little of that burden with you, but it doesn't mean he loves you any less. You were his older brother; Emma told me how much he looked up to you growing up. So don't ever for a second feel like you aren't as much a part of that family to him as any one of them." She smiled softly at him and he couldn't contain the swell of his heart. The pain in his head seemed to have dissipated now, he reached forward and pressed his lips to Cristina's. He could feel her smile beneath his mouth, her full lips soft under his own. Her hands were splayed against his chest and he realized with a start that he wasn't wearing a shirt when he felt her warm fingers against his bare skin. Her mouth parted and slid against his own, sparking his nerves with desire. His hands were gentle, cupping her face when he remembered Kieran's words in the Seelie lands; I am surprised at how gentle you are with her, Mark. You do not show such gentleness with me. Is it that you do not feel tenderness towards me, or that you are afraid you are going break her? The thought teased him, angry at himself for thinking of Kieran right now. But then again, when he kissed Kieran he often thought of Cristina as well. It was like a sick game his mind liked to play.

He pushed the thought from his mind, determined to not let his contemplations get the better of him. As if something snapped inside him, his hands moved down to grip her hips tightly. He felt Cristina gasp in his mouth when his opened over her's, his tongue sliding along the roof of her mouth as he flipped her around and under him. Breathing sped up, a soft moan escaping her lips as she met the fervor of his kisses with her own fire. Her hands were raking down his chest, reaching the waistband of his pants. With a growl, he grabbed her by the wrists and forced her hands above her head. His lips left a trail of hot kisses on her neck, sucking at the pulse point above her collarbone. He heard her whimper and pulled back abruptly.