Chapter 28

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Warning, this gets mushy as hell and I'm totally not sorry :) This one's for the Kota lovers out there...enjoy!

Also, the end is coming...not sure when but soon...happy reading!!

*Kota*

67...68...69... "I think she's probably ready by now, what do you think? Is she ready? Should I go knock? No, that's stupid she already knows I'm here. Should I–"

"Holy fuck, Kota. Chill the fuck out before Trouble sees you freaking out and thinks you're not excited for your first date," Gabe mutters, putting an end to my rambling nonsense.

70...71...72...73...deep breath...74... "I can't help it. I'm nervous," I admit, running a hand through my hair.

Sean laughs from the table where he and most of the others not on missions are eating an early dinner, something he actually cooked by himself. His newfound cooking talent was a shock to all of us, and every time someone praises his food, he and Sang share a secret smile full of love that I envy. I'm not jealous that Sean and Sang had some much needed quality time together, but I've been waiting anxiously for some of my own. Watching as one after another of my brothers smile wider and walk with less weight on their shoulders after getting her all to themselves, even for a short time, has been hard. I love them and all, but I need her too.

Today, however, when I finally took the chance to ask her out–although really it was my sister's doing since she wanted to double date with Sand now that she's found someone, several someones–I'm as nervous as a virgin on prom night, according to Nathan at least.

"Kota, you'll be fine. My Pookie is a forgiving soul, so she won't hold it against you that your sister had to ask her out for you." Did I just say that I loved them? Because I'd like to take that back.

The others laugh as I send a glare his way. "Thanks for that, Sean. Very helpful. Really."

75...76...77...78... "Dude, calm down. This is Sang we're talking about. She'd be happy picking up trash on the side of the highway as long as you were there to do it with her. Time and place don't matter if you're with someone you love." Surprised, I turn and stare at Axel, who normally doesn't say much about our strange relationship.

To be totally honest, sometimes I feel like he's not really invested in this, or that he cares about Sang as much as the rest of us, but that's unfair to assume from his silence on the matter. Even he gets more time with her than most of us since they've apparently been running every morning since he'd met her, and they'd informed that they had registered to run the annual Charleston marathon after Christmas. It had been postponed to later in January because of the rain we've been having, and I fight back the sad spike of envy when I see them dressed for the gym before dawn.

"You're right, Axel. But do you think she'll have fun just going to dinner and a movie? And not even with just me?" I've never second judged my decisions so much, but I want her to enjoy our first date ever, to enjoy her time with me, not just play along so she doesn't hurt my feelings.

79...80...81...hands slap down on my shoulders, stalling my stress count as Nathan shakes me just slightly. "Kota, man, stop this. Sang loves you, and Jess is her best friend so she'll have an even better time with the both of you. Stop worrying about stuff that will never happen, you couldn't mess this up even if you tried."

82...83... "I just want her to be in love with me like she is with everyone else," I admit, and immediately feel like a dumbass for how stupid my fear sounds, but it's how I feel.

I see their eyes go over my shoulder, focusing on something behind me and can't fight the wince. There's only one person that could be there that would have even Axel's face taking on an "oh shit" expression like that.

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