CROWNS I: Of Desolate Hope | ✔

29. The End of Jaessa

"Jaessa," said Thom, sitting on the side of her bed. "Is that all of it?"

Jaessa didn't answer, she was too busy frantically searching the messy room, lit only by a few candles, for something. Where did I put it? Shit! She pushed Thom off of the bed and ripped the covers off but there was nothing there. Wait, what am I even looking for?

"I think we should take a break," said Thom, watching Jaessa dart across the room like a madwoman. "We've been at this for hours. It's been a few days since I warned you, we got rid of everything and they haven't come. I'm sure they're too busy with the Kingcall to be looking for a random girl in the city. I'm sure there's nothing to worry about."

Jaessa shot him a look of both agony and frustration. "I can't let this happen to me!" she said, opening a chest by the oak wardrobe. "It happened to my parents but it won't happen to me. I won't let it..." She picked up the sword that she hadn't held since she had first arrived in the capital. It felt different to back then. She expected to feel relief but all she felt was more anxiety.

"I'll take that," said Thom, ripping it out of Jaessa's trembling hands. "If they were to come, I think having a sword like that wouldn't help the situation."

Jaessa reluctantly let go as she wandered to the closed window and pushed open the shutters. The eerie light from the moon rushed into her room like the wind and filled it with its strange warmth. That...feels better I guess. She opened the small window at the top and was instantly greeted with the smell of fresh pastries and wine. Thom was hit by the delightful aroma just as hard and joined Jaessa by the window.

"You can't keep missing work," he said, staring down at the group of young men in their expensive clothes on the street below. "If you keep claiming to be sick, they'll become suspicious."

"What do you want me to do then, Thom?" pleaded Jaessa. "Tell me. What do you want me to do?"

"It might be possible to sneak out of the city," he replied, making a rude hand gesture toward the men. "I met a smuggler not too long ago. She could get you out without a problem."

Jaessa sighed and frowned. You're trying this again?

"Don't pull that face, Jaessa," he said, playfully punching her arm, before realising his mistake.

"I've told you before, I'm not running from this!" she replied, hitting him a lot harder. 

"I'm just trying to look out for you," said Thom, in a gentle whisper.

Jaessa hugged him. "I know."

The pair continued to gaze out of the window. The men on the street, who Jaessa assumed were young knights, were soon joined by women as they wandered off into the night, following the food and wine. She knew where they were going and felt the urge to ask Thom what he thought but she soon dispelled the idea. A little further into the distance stood the Hanfort. Its white walls had a strange glow to them but Jaessa knew that it was just the lights from the feast. She had always longed to feast at the castle and from childhood and had imagined how good all the food tasted but now it was impossible to fulfil that dream. Slowly but surely, all of Jaessa's ambitions and hopes had come to a grinding halt. What have I done...

Thom saw the confused look on Jaessa's face. "If you're wondering whether you've done the wrong thing - you haven't," he said, softly. "I just wish it wasn't you who had to do it."

"Me too," she replied, scanning the street like a watchman. "My parents tried it. Even Sir March did - I don't want to end up like them Thom. I'm scared."

Thom made a sound which suggested uncertainty. "You won't, Jaessa," he said, "it doesn't take a wizard to see that it will be nothing like what happened then. Times have changed and the people love you -well they love Isabelle Murrow - but still, they definitely wouldn't let that happen."