The Mafia Bride

49.

Alex and I went out for a drink. It was supposed to be just one drink but I'd been down lately so I let myself loose. Turns out, getting drunk is a bad idea. Because according to my cousin dearest, I drunkenly confessed about having a crush on Meg. What nonsense? I do not have a crush on Meg. I do not like her. I admit she has the most expressive doe-like eyes and skin the colour of gold and honey. She does look cute when she scrunches up her nose when she laughs or when her hair gets all messy. And her lips... when I look at her lips, she has such beautifully shaped lips, the kind made just for kissing and being kissed. She's gorgeous when she isn't looking at me. But, she's the prettiest when she looks at me and catches me looking at her. A rosy blush brightens her face, and she smiles a little. It kills me. She's beautiful no doubt, but she's so much more. She has that sweetness about her that literally reflects in everything. She talks sweetly, she smiles sweetly, she even blushes sweetly. Sure, she has her dramatic moments. But, even at her worst, she's sweet. She's Dolcezza, sweetness.

Fine, I admit all that is true. But that doesn't mean I like her or anything. Alex is being a dick to me. He says I'm confused. That's so not true. If I liked her I wouldn't have scared her. Honestly, if I liked a girl I'd be honest about it with her, it's just the way I am. If I liked a girl, I wouldn't scare her or have Alex point a gun to her head. I scared Meg, it shows I don't like her. But, I do feel guilty for doing that. I'm a heartless don but I have a conscience okay? One of the disadvantages of a sharp memory.

Alex teased me about going soft. He says I haven't been myself ever since I threatened Meg. It's utter bull. I've been doing just fine. Alex teases me by saying I should ask her out. No way in hell. Never going to happen. I don't know why he'd get such an absurd idea like me and Meg together. I mean she'd never say yes to me after she's known who I am. She's capable, sassy and hot, she won't like some crude gangster, like me. She's so sophisticated and classy. I bet she'd shoot me if I even tried to go near her.

I thought about everything a lot. Well, Alex is partly right. My guilt of scaring Meg is eating me up. I should apologise, for closure. I will tell her I'm sorry for my behaviour next time I see her. At least, that would tell Alex I don't like Meg.

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