Dear Diary

Chapter 1

September 04th 1940

I never thought that my life could change in like four seconds.

Im living the life of a normal teenager. Okay, maybe Im not normal at all but I used to be. Well, I was born in very hard times. The Second World War is there just to show Its bigness and Its power to destroy humans. Im living In London and I heard actually pretty much about him. If Id say his name It would have big consequences. This city has never been as quiet as It is now. I live in London as I said and London is popular in my eyes. But London didnt get Tourists this year. All of them were Germans and a half were Jews . The other half is dead.

My father is sitting in his armchair right now. Hes reading old newspapers because the new ones are too expensive and too full of bad news. He looks as if hell get shot in a few seconds. Thats his pokerface since all year.

My mother died in January 1939. She was the only one bringing light and hope into this awful family. I miss her. I miss her more than words can say.

Youll never get out of this house alone., my father always said. I can only see 10% of what others see. Im not allowed to take any step without my family because any step could be my last one.

I enjoyed going to school. It was fine because I had something to do. I havent seen anything but I had some friends. They can be counted on the fingers of one hand or rather on three fingers but thats also fine. My father always said that it could be dangerous for me to make friends. I dont really know why. Well, maybe he was afraid that I could get bullied after a time and he was right. He obviously trusts nobody and maybe thats good to get through life. Thats why I was never mad at him. He is like the only person that I can really talk to. Sure Id like to have some friends who I can talk to when I have problems. But Its not that bad now.

Evelin, where are you? my father shouts. In the kitchen, father. I answer. He comes through the door. How do you feel, darling? As good as the situation is. And how is the situation? Fine. This little talk is like the only thing that you can hear in this house on one day. Maybe in one week. Hes going outside and I decide to go to my room.

Actually, the situation is kind of sad. Its like everything I say ends with an sad or bored person or a argumentation. Give me one reason to live. I think Im not really important to people. I dont even exist for them because they dont exist for me. I take my diary. Its better to let all my feelings out on paper than on people. My father doesnt read it because hes just not interested. When I look very closely on the paper I can see what Im writing. It must look really weird but It helps.

Dear Diary,

Im scared of telling people how I really feel. I feel like everything will never be the same. Like the world will go under. But anyways, on the and of this black hole I see a little light. Maybe some day something nice will happen. Maybe we will all be saved one day.

Your Evelin.

I put my diary under my bed. Maybe I should try another start to play the piano. It reminds me of living my normal life. I cant read piano notes so I dont need them to play. Mother always said: Darling, you have to learn with notes. But I didnt learn with notes. Its too difficult for me because I cant see them. Thats why Its like a feeling to play piano. I was always very good at it. My mother said it was my special talent. She loved when I played but now shes gone. No one else likes my special talent and no one likes to hear it but I keep playing for her. Maybe she can still hear me.

Dinner!, my father shouts. Wait. What? Since when is he doing dinner and since when is any happy noise in this house? Im nervous. Im going downstairs slowly and carefully.