Gods in Goode HS ✓

The Dance, Part 3 (Finale)

DISCLAIMER: I'M NOT RICK RIORDAN, AND I DO NOT OWN PERCY JACKSON.

Gods POV

"No way," Diana said, crossing her arms.

Felicity, the youngest recruited Hunter, stepped forward. 

"Way," she confirmed.

"Do you expect me to believe that...that you're all magical immortal girls?" Diana said incredulously. "You're freaking kidding me. You might as well have said that you were Smurfs."

"It is true," Anna said. "I mean, it is true that we are immortal, not that we are Smurfs. I'm eighty-five years in age. Yet I remain in a body of a fourteen-year-old."

"And I," Artemis spoke, "am the Greek goddess of the Hunt. I am Lady Artemis."

"Yeah, right." Diana was beginning to look snarky. "You're crazy, Luna."

Phoebe stared her down. "Guard your tongue, mortal," she said coolly. "You are talking to an Olympian. Our precious goddess, at that."

"Do you not believe me?" Artemis questioned.

Diana scoffed. "Thought I made that clear."

Artemis turned to her Hunters. "How come none of you gave me a hard time when I recruited you?"

"Um, maybe it will help if you're not dressed in that...say, provocative garment," Irving volunteered. "You're not exactly a good example of maidenhood, m'lady."

Artemis groaned. "Aphrodite..." she cursed. Then she noticed Demeter clutching Hermes and Hades roughly and heading toward the gardens. "Demeter!" she called. "Hermes! Hades! Am I not the maiden goddess of the Hunt?"

"Stop bragging," Hermes yelled back at her. "It's not like I wanted that occupation!"

The huntresses looked at Hermes and at each other strangely. Demeter shouted at them, "You girls may be immortal, but that doesn't mean you're healthy!" and tossed a few cereal bars at them before dragging her hostages off to the garden.

"See?" Artemis said to Diana, after brushing aside some crushed granola from her own skirt.

Diana frowned. "That's so lame. So you paid a couple of losers to say that you're some goddess. Big deal."

Artemis sighed heavily and turned to Phoebe. "Get Lieutenant Thalia," she said. "Perhaps she'll know how to deal with this."

~*~

"Why?" Demeter said, menacingly making the vines behind the two gods grow and wrap themselves on some godly necks.

Hermes winced and thought grimly of the rash he will get if Demeter puts enchanted poison ivy in his underpants.

"Look, Demeter," Hades said. "It's not like we forced our sons on your daughters. Your child Lily was the one who invited Nico to the dance. And Katie Gardner..." Hades frowned and turned to his nephew. "What exactly happened?"

"He...well, um, he played a prank on her," Hermes mumbled sheepishly.

Demeter frowned. "And how is that a decent courtship? She probably felt so sorry for his patheticalness—"

"Is that a word?" Hades muttered.

"Obviously," Demeter said, clipping her voice. Then she continued where she left off. "—that, out of the goodness of her heart, she settled with him, knowing no one else will!"

"Now wait a minute!" Hermes cried angrily. "My son does not have pathecall!"

"Now that is not a word," Hades said.