A Guide to Our Love [gxg]

Chapter Three

Alexia

Jonah. She ditched me for Jonah. We had talked about seeing the movie today for weeks. I had pre-ordered the tickets as soon as I could so I could surprise her. I was so excited. But now she wants to see it with Jonah. I have no idea what I'm going to do with the tickets now. I guess I'll just return them and get my money back.

I stared at the ceiling wondering what had changed in our friendship. We used to always keep our promises to each other. This isn't the first time she's ditched me for Jonah and I had the feeling it wouldn't be the last.

I felt a tear run down my cheek. I didn't even realize I had started crying, but I just wiped them away and willed myself to stop crying. I sat up and forced myself to get up instead of moping in my bed all day.

As stood up and shakily walked downstairs to get breakfast. I prayed my eyes weren't red and it wasn't obvious I had been crying. I didn't want to worry my dad as I was bound to see him as I made my way to the kitchen.

"Hey, kid. Want pancakes and bacon for breakfast?" My dad asked. I guess they couldn't tell. It would have been the first thing out of his mouth. He has never been the type to beat around the bush when it comes to mental health.

"Yeah, I guess," I mumbled as I took my medicine out of the cabinet. I unscrewed the lids and took a pill out of each. God, I felt like shit. I hadn't felt this bad in a long time. But all I could do was push through it. I swallowed the pills and curled up on the couch.

"Sweetheart. Are you okay?" My dad asked. I hated that I made him concerned. I didn't need to look at him to know the look I was getting. He had been looking at me with that concerned, pitying look for years.

"Dad, I promise I'm fine. I just didn't get enough sleep last night." I just wanted him to stop worrying. I'm not going to be able to depend on him every time I feel a little sad or anxious. He's a single parent he has enough to worry about.

"If you're sure you're fine. Oh. By the way, you have an appointment with Dr. Garret at three tomorrow," my dad informed me. Dr. Garret is the therapist that I've been seeing for two years. I used to hate going to see him, but he's actually helped me a lot.

"Can one of you drive me? I don't really feel like going alone."

"Yeah, of course."

After breakfast, I decided to go back to bed. As soon as I laid down, I curled up into a ball and tried not to cry. But as I thought of Evelynne and Jonah together, I felt my eyes start to water. Evelynne was really all I had besides my parents. I have a hard time making friends and talking to people. She is the only person I have never been nervous around.

I felt the tears start to roll down my cheeks...so much for not moping all day.

Evelynne

I couldn't focus on the movie at all. My mind kept wandering back to Alexia. She had been so excited to see this with me. I shouldn't have agreed to go with Jonah, but I can't go back now. I'll have to find a way to make it up to her.

"Hey, babe. I'm gonna go get more popcorn. Want anything?" He said, startling me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah. Can you get me some sour patch kids?"

"Okay. Be right back." He pecked me on the lips and got up.

I didn't even notice when he got back. I was too caught up in my thoughts. I had to think of a way to make this up to her. I just kept feeling worse and worse about this and I don't know why. Was it just because she's been having a hard time lately? Or was it something else entirely? But what I did know was that I had to get out of here.

I abruptly stood up and ran out of the theater. I could see the movie at a different time, but I have to see Alexia now. It's the only way to calm my mind. I ran to the gas station across the street and called a Uber since Jonah drove us here. As I was waiting I texted Alexia and asked if I could come over. I got no response, so I just decided to go over anyway.

I ignored Jonah's texts as I waited. I didn't know how to answer him. How would I even tell him that I left because I needed to see Alexia? Even though he likes her, I think he gets jealous of the amount of time we spend together. I would just end up hurting him if I told him I was thinking of her the whole time.

As I got into the Uber I told him the address. I had no idea what state she was going to be in. Would she be fine and act like nothing ever happened? Or would she be in bed, unable to find the energy to move? I honestly didn't know which one was worse.

"We're here," the driver said, startling me out of my thoughts.

"Thanks. Have a good day." I got out of the car and walked to the porch. I debated on whether I should knock or just walk in. Normally I would either just walk in or use my key, but this time felt different. By the time I had made up my mind the door was opened, revealing Martin, Alexia's dad.

"Hey. Why didn't you just come in?"

"I was just about to," I replied. I wasn't. I don't know why but my gut told me that I shouldn't. He opened the door and motioned me inside. I walked in and followed him to the kitchen.

"I have a question to ask you. Have you noticed anything off with Lex? She's just been acting off but I don't know why?" Huh. So I wasn't the only one who noticed the change in her.

"Yeah, but I couldn't tell you why. I've been really worried and she won't say anything."

"Okay.... well if she says anything let me know how serious it is. I might have to do something to help." That's the one thing I've always admired about her dad. He's never pried or forced me to tell me what's wrong if Lex told me in confidence. He just asks how bad it is so he knows.

"For sure."

"Thank you. She's up in her room if you want to talk. She's not in the best mood, just so you know." I nodded at him and walked up the stairs and into her room. I was even more worried now. If her dad was really worried then something is really wrong.

The whole way to her room I had a bad feeling in my stomach. As soon as I opened the door I knew why. I found Alexia lying on her side, curled up into a fetal position. She had tears running down her face and didn't even look up when I came into the room and shut the door.

"Hey, Lex," I said as I sat next to her and brushed my hand through her hair. She didn't respond and just moved away from my touch.

"Hey, can you tell me what's wrong?" I was frowning. I hated seeing her like this. She hasn't been in this bad of state in a while. I was doubtful she would even respond.

"You wanna know what's wrong. Are you serious?!" She abruptly sat up and yelled, shocking me. I couldn't do anything but stare as she got up and faced me with tears still rolling down her face. "What's wrong is the fact that you don't really care about me anymore! You ditch me, never answer my calls or texts, and rarely even talk to me anymore! Do you even care? You ask if I'm okay, but I don't think you actually want to know. Pretty much every time we see each other it's always Jonah this, Jonah that! I can barely get a word in because you are so caught up in your relationship you can't see how it affects other people! You're ruining our relationship over some guy that will just dump you anyway!"

"So that's the problem! Jonah! You're fucking jealous of Jonah. Well, maybe you just can't handle the fact that he's the one that can make me happy, not you! You're so fucking selfish! Why can't you just accept the fact that I love him, and can't spend my every waking moment with you! I can't spend every day coddling you and making you feel better! I need an actual life! Maybe I would be better off if I had never met you!" As soon as I said it we both froze. I could see the hurt and sadness burning in her eyes. I don't know why I said it. I just hated the way she put down my relationship like that. She had no right to say that he was just going to dump me.

"You need to get out. Now." I had never heard her dad's voice sound so cold. I didn't even hear him come into the room. He potioned himself in front of Alexia and looked at me venomously. I was still frozen.

"I said you need to get out! Now!" That startled me out of my daze. I run out of the house and down to the sidewalk. I looked to the sky as my eyes burned with tears.

What had I just done?