How to Stay Afloat

~45: Where He Meets Her Brother~

Chapter 45: Where He Meets Her Brother

~~

All I could think about at this moment was how much Fallon would hate this.

The silence.

Everyone dressed in black.

People crying.

The sorrow. The sadness.

It was nothing like Fallon.

The Fallon I know loves colors and laughter. Fallon is like sunshine in the winter.

Fallon is. . . .

I stopped myself.

Fallon was all of those things.

Fallon isn't here anymore I reminded myself.

The funeral service had been arranged by the Café Fallon had worked at. I'd just stood there in silence. Thankfully a familiar feeling of numbness had taken over. I'd gone through all the formalities in a trance.

It was almost as if I was having an out-of-body experience.

So many people had shown up to pay their respect, people who had never bothered to show her kindness where she'd been alive. People who'd called her names and laughed at her were now shedding tears at her funeral. The irony of it almost had me laughing.

Caroline's parents were hosting the funeral reception in their home. I sat there in the convertible in the Williams's driveway unable to muster up the strength to go inside. Whereas other people who'd been close to her like Peyton, Caroline, and Colton seemed to find comfort in each other's presence, being around other people or even hearing someone say her name had me spiraling into a state of crippling panic.

The radio was playing. I hadn't been paying attention till I heard his name.

"David Hastings has been taken into Police Custody.

After the unfortunate events that unfolded three days ago that led to the tragic death of a high-school student, David Hastings has confessed to manipulating the outcome of the O'Malley case three years ago by bribing members of the jury.

The defense lawyer on this case, his son Jordan Hastings, knew nothing about this entire exchange. Jordan unfortunately took his own life soon after Damien O'Malley's arrest after being accused by the public of being the one who manipulated the case. . .

I yanked the door open and got out of the car. My breath came out in pants and I loosened the tie from around my neck. I felt like my heart was going to burst out of my chest. My hands grasped the back of my neck as I stared blankly at the ground.

"Wake up" I wanted to scream to myself. "Just wake up from this fucking nightmare already."

Suddenly a voice cut in.

"Can't go inside, huh?"

My head snapped up in the direction of the voice.

The same red hair, the same hazel eyes.

The similarity was uncanny.

"Thanks for flying me out here man," Jamie said as he walked towards me.

I had contacted Jamie two days ago. I'd told him about his sister. How she had been planning to introduce herself to him. How excited and nervous she had been about finally getting to know her little brother. I'd paid for his flight here from Florida so he could attend her Funeral and made arrangements for him to stay at Colton's place for the time he was here.

When I didn't respond Jamie sighed. "You know it's so weird. Everyone inside is talking about how much they loved her, what an amazing person she was and I can't find a single thing to say about her. Not one thing and she was my sister goddamn it!" His voice shook. "She was my family. I should have known. I should have searched for her! But now it's too late and I'll never get to know her."

There was silence. The leaves on the trees rustled as a gentle breeze blew.

"Her favorite color was lilac," I spoke softly.

Jamie's eyes widened a fraction but he didn't say anything.

"She had the most unique taste in clothes. She loved bright colors and sequins. She wasn't afraid to stand out." My lips tilted into a rueful smile.

"She had a sweet tooth. She loved deserts and she hated eating alone."

"She cried every time she watched 'Spirit, Stallion of the Cimarron.

She loved animals." My voice came out gruff.

"She was kind and warm." My eyes finally met his. "And even though she hadn't met you, she loved you," I told him. "She had always wanted a family so badly. She was planning on moving to Florida so she could be closer to you."

Jamie swallowed. His eyes filled up with tears. "Thank you." He whispered. "Thank you, I needed to hear that."

I took a deep breath.

"I have something that I wanted to give you," I said quietly.

I took the keys to the convertible from my pocket and held them out towards him.

His eyebrows drew together in confusion.

"The convertible," I said as I motioned to the car behind me. "Your father left it for Fallon."

I placed the keys in his hands when he still hadn't made a move to take them.

"Now it's yours."

And then I left without another word.

Because I knew if I stayed any longer I would completely break down.