(Not Quite) An Autobiography

Saturday again (1)

Henry woke up late. For a time, he just enjoyed laying there, stretching, falling back to some kind of light sleep, full of half-awoken-dreams. At 10 AM, he finally got out of bed, put on his loose Homer Simpson T-Shirt over his boxers, prepared himself a solid breakfast (coffee, bread, butter, jelly, Nutella, orange juice), put everything on a tray and savored it in front of the latest rerun of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

Like He-Man or the Cosmocats, the 80's version of the cartoon was so much better... But at least it wasn't like any of the 90's Japanese anime where the heroes were not actually fighting but were playing cards or spinning-tops or abusing cute little monsters.

When he had finished his breakfast, he played GTA for about two hours. He probably would have skipped lunch and continued to play if his cell phone hadn't rung. Tom's name and stupid face appeared on the screen. He paused the game and picked up.

"Hey Man!"

"What up Tom?"

"It's been a while since we got hammered!"

"Apparently, you don't have your wife and kids around."

"Nope! So let's get drunk and fuck strangers." answered Tom, in a deadly serious voice.

"I bet you have Marie's blessing for that..."

"Nope! Let's do it!"

"Who's in?" laughed Henry in return.

"Alex and Paola!"

"Paola? Are you kidding me?" burst Henry.

"Dude, June is not in the picture anymore remember? You won't have to listen to her bitch about it when you get home. If you go home..."

"Hum... True. Then I guess I'll be able to watch her and be miserable none the less."

Tom sighed exagerately:

"Come on, Henry, if Paola doesn't want you, there are plenty of other girls waiting for you to fuck them."

"Like my neighbor..."

"What?"

"I'll tell you later." discarded Henry. "What time?"

"Fuck yes! 8 PM sharp! At the Ayers Rock!"

"See you tonight then!"

Time to get up off his ass.

*

He was not hungry. So, instead of having lunch, Henry put on his wannabe-athlete outfit and his worn out, out-of-date running shoes. Percival got the message instantly and started to jump and bark.

A few minutes later, the labrador was running after imaginary rabbits in the park. His master was huffing loudly trying not to think about the evening to come. He was failing.

It had been a while since he went out with his friends. Thankfully, Tom never gave a shit that Henry turned him down so often these last few months. He had continued to pester him every time his wife was away with their girls. On his part, Alex would comment on Henry's depression for sure, make fun of it. A lot. All night long. As for Paola...

Henry had a crush from the moment he saw her. She was small with a nice figure, a pale complexion and a dark mane of long untamed hair. But Henry noticed all that only later. Because he had been hypnotized by her eyes. Her big, hard, deep, black eyes. And because of this strange fascination, Henry had never been able to be himself in her presence, breaking his silence only to mumble trivialities. So when he had gathered enough bravery to ask her out, it was so pitiful, so like an insecure teenage boy, that she had burst into genuine laughter. It was long before Henry even met June, but it still hurt. Seeing her again tonight, single again... Henry was terrified.